JAM:PJones,WRichard,TRice,RStilgoe
WELCOME TO JUST A MINUTE!

starring PETER JONES, WENDY RICHARD, TIM RICE and RICHARD STILGOE, chaired by NICHOLAS PARSONS (Radio, 23 February 1991)

NOTE: Richard Stilgoe's last appearance, Edward Taylor's last show as producer.


NICHOLAS PARSONS: Welcome to Just A Minute!

THEME MUSIC

NP: Hello my name is Nicholas Parsons. And as the Minute Waltz fades away once more, itís my pleasure to introduce the four diverse and talented players who this week are going to play Just A Minute. We welcome back Peter Jones, Wendy Richard and Tim Rice and only for the second time on this show Richard Stilgoe. Will you please welcome all four of them! Beside me sits our producerís secretary Anne Ling who has a whistle and a stopwatch to keep the score and also blows the whistle when the 60 seconds are up. And as usual I will ask our four competitors to speak if they can on the subject I will give them and they will try and do that without hesitation, repetition or deviating from the subject. And we begin the show this week with Richard Stilgoe. Richard, the subject, oh a delightful one, biscuits in bed. Will you tell us something about that in Just A Minute starting now.

RICHARD STILGOE: The last time I was on this programme which was weeks and weeks ago I didnít do particularly well. So I thought this time, well, Iíve been...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice you challenged.

TIM RICE: Deviation, hesitation and repetition!

NP: Which challenge are you going for?

TR: Iíll go for the lack of biscuit content in, ie. deviation.

RS: I was just about to talk about it.

NP: No I wonít give deviation.

TR: But there again...

NP: I would have given repetition on the, repeating the...

BUZZ

PETER JONES: Iíll challenge for repetition!

NP: Itís a bit late now Peter. You should have challenged before.

RS: Iím not doing very well this time either!

NP: No you are doing very well Richard. Because Tim challenged first, I disagree with his challenge of deviation. So you get a point for an incorrect challenge, you keep the subject, you have 52 seconds left, biscuits in bed starting now.

RS: (in a pretty good impression of the famous Clement Freud monotone) The way to make biscuits in bed, I thought, you see, that if I possibly wasnít myself, that it might be more successful and itís proving... The way to make biscuits in bed...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Repetition of successful.

NP: Yes you said it in the beginning yes.

RS: Did I say successful last time?

NP: I wasnít very successful last time, yes.

RS: But in a completely different voice!

NP: A clever idea Richard, but no. Within the rules of the game I think I have to say yes, that was repetition of the word successful. Tim you have a correct challenge, 43 seconds are left, biscuits in bed starting now.

TR: Anybody eating biscuits in bed must be crackers! It is a very dangerous thing to do. Crumbs get everywhere and spoil almost every conceivable nocturnal activity. Who would be crazy enough to consume a... thing...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: I think there was a hesitation there.

NP: There was definitely a hesitation. He was trying to think what he was going to consume while he was in bed. You take back the subject, biscuits in bed starting now.

RS: (Clement Freud voice) Butter, sugar and possibly some flour all mixed together in a bowl, and then stirred around until you, itís time to put them into a baking dish which you have greased carefully beforehand, before putting it into...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard has challenged.

RS: Befores.

WENDY RICHARD: Much as I was enjoying that, itís actually biscuits in bed and not in a greased baking dish.

NP: No I do think that was much more of a cooking recipe than biscuits in bed.

TR: Hear hear!

NP: So I agree with your challenge of deviation Wendy, and you take over the subject having gained a point for a correct challenge and 13 seconds are left starting now.

WR: Personally I think eating biscuits in bed is quite a dreadful habit. It doesnít matter if one is consuming garribaldies, gypsy creams... or buttery (collapses in laughter)

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Hesitation.

NP: Yes indeed. So weíve heard from everybody on this first subject which is nice. And there are two seconds left Peter, very cleverly got in just before, biscuits in bed, starting now.

PJ: They go with Ovaltine and itís not my idea of what beds were made for!

WHISTLE

NP: Just to remind some who may be less familiar with the rules. Whoever is speaking when the whistle goes gets the extra point. And it is on this occasion Peter Jones, whoís equal in the lead with Richard Stilgoe at the end of the first round. Wendy would you take the second subject. It is sunbathing. Would you tell us something about that in Just A Minute starting now.

WR: I actually do not approve of sunbathing. It can cause premature ageing of the skin, wrinkling and cancer of the epidermis. When we were just on our holiday recently in rather hot parts of the world, I declined from sunbathing. I didnít come back as suntanned as some of our companions. But I felt it better to be safe than sorry. I did in actual fact have quite a healthy looking glow. In fact some people said that it was the best theyíd seen me look for a long time. But...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: Repetition of some people.

NP: Another point and the subject of sunbathing with 29 seconds starting now.

PJ: Iím trying to remember the name of that Greek person who was chained to a rock and pecked to death by eagles. I suggest that he might well have invented sunbathing. Iím not too keen on it myself. I donít like people to look terribly leathery like arm chairs, you know, when they come back from their holidays. Not even Wendy, but of course she always looks delightful and has a glow whatever the time of day or year it is. Though I do think sheís terribly disapproving. Sheís already told us that she doesnít approve of...

WHISTLE

NP: Though Peter got off the subject of sunbathing on to the subject of Wendy Richard, nobody challenged him for deviation. He kept going until the whistle went. And Peter itís your turn to begin, the subject is Birmingham. I donít know how much you know about the city but will you tell us something about it in this game starting now.

PJ: Brum as itís called by some of the locals. Gilbert Keith Chesterton went there via Beachy Head or he did in a poem. Probably quite a good route to Birmingham because theyíre always spilling lorries, arenít they, or their loads are falling off on the M1 and it might um...

BUZZ

NP: Oh Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Deviation.

NP: Why?

TR: I donít think there would have been lorries in Chestertonís time. Wasnít it Chesterton he was going on about?

NP: No, no, no, he did establish the M1 before that, and the M1 was certainly not in existence in Chestertonís time.

TR: Exactly!

NP: And therefore...

TR: Thatís my point exactly.

NP: Lorries were, are on the M1 so I donít think he was deviating. He went from Chesterton, he had to keep going, he went on to the M1 which now goes to Birmingham and he talked about lorries. I think his thought processes were perfectly straightforward so I disagree with your challenge.

TR: Itís just taken you two minutes to explain them!

NP: I know. It just shows you how fair I like to be within the rules of Just A Minute.

RS: And the M1 doesnít go to Birmingham. But leave that, weíll leave that!

NP: Yes I took the round about route to Birmingham. Right! So er Peter you have a point for an incorrect challenge, you keep Birmingham and 43 seconds left starting now.

PJ: On a personal note I did my very first broadcast from Birmingham ages ago. And I had four lines in a play. And we rehearsed for the same number of days so there was one day for each er um of the other things that I said...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Hesitation.

NP: Yes indeed Tim, right, 29 seconds for you on Birmingham starting now.

TR: The magical city of Birmingham has three major football teams, viz Aston Villa who play at Villa Park, West...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe.

RS: Repetition of Villa.

NP: Yes. If you start to show off your knowledge of football then you get into trouble donít you. Richard you got in with a correct challenge and 21 seconds on Birmingham starting now.

RS: People are always very rude about the city of Birmingham because some years...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Deviation, I began by saying it was a magnificent city.

RS: Thatís true.

NP: Well some people do say, but not you Tim.

TR: No he said people are always rude about Birmingham and I was not, therefore that was a deviation. He was inaccurate.

RS: I was, I was going to crawl to the City Council as well, later on.

NP: He didnít say all people are always rude. He just said people are always rude.

RS: I think heís right, Nicholas!

NP: Iíve never known such generosity on this programme! Fifteen seconds left Tim, Birmingham, starting now.

TR: The most stupid audience Iíve ever come across was from Birmingham. They disagreed with every conceivable intelligent point of view about football teams from that county...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: He mentioned football before.

NP: You mentioned football before.

TR: I think heís right.

NP: Yes, still trying to show off your knowledge of football. But there are five seconds on Birmingham with you, Peter Jones, starting now.

PJ: Two decades later I was asked to go there again for another performance. But it didnít happen...

WHISTLE

NP: Peter Jones was once more speaking as the whistle went and has increased his lead at the end of that round. And Tim Rice, your turn to begin. The subject is commercial free gifts. Can you tell us something about those, that happen to all of us through the post and elsewhere, starting now.

TR: I would like to deal with this topic in five principal categories. Firstly, the reaction of the consumer on being told he has been given a commercial free gift...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: Actually I think Iíve made a rickit, because I thought there was two commercials.

NP: No, commercial is on the card.

WR: I beg your pardon, Mr Rice.

NP: And so you pick it up again Tim with 50 seconds to go, commercial free gifts starting now.

TR: Thirdly what about the damage this can do to the economy? People have never thought when issuing these reckless free presents around the shop just how much harm they can do to goods that have to be paid for and earned by toil, honest sweat, blood... I wish somebody would interrupt me!

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has.

PJ: Well I interrupted because he wanted someone to. It was kind of um...

NP: What do you want to give the challenge as?

PJ: ...a mercy... what?

NP: What is your challenge then?

PJ: Ah, deviation.

NP: Another point to you Peter, 31 seconds left on commercial free gifts starting now.

PJ: I donít really like receiving these offers because they always prove to be ummm...

BUZZ

NP: Um Wendy. So Wendy got in...

WR: Slight hesitation.

NP: Yes, 25 seconds Wendy, commercial free gifts starting now.

WR: Commercial free gifts really irritate me. How many of us sitting here have received those letters through the post saying youíve won a car, a villa in Spain, a pearl necklace, a gold lighter or watch or whatever. And really all they want to do is to get you along to some office not too far from here I might add, and try and force you into buying some timeshare place. And when you get there you find you havenít won anything at all. Itís...

WHISTLE

NP: Wendy you kept going very fluenty till the whistle went. Have you actually had personal experience of that?

WR: Well weíve had about three letters now, havenít we, saying that weíve won a car. I would actually love to turn up and see what they said, you know...

NP: Mmmmm!

WR: If you really have got your car or if youíve got to buy one of their timeshare places.

RS: Nicholas, there was a great fuss quite recently because Edward Heath got sent one of these things and went along to this timeshare meeting. And everybody was sitting there saying "why is Edward Heath here?" And Edward Heath was sitting there saying (in Edward Heath voice) "whereís my Ford Fiesta?"

NP: And what did they reply, in that...

RS: I think he did it quite deliberately in order to show up the system and I think it worked very well.

NP: And Richard itís your turn to begin. The subject is rotten guests. Would you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

RS: Itís something I didnít know very much about, until about... 15 minutes ago...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Two abouts.

NP: There were two abouts.

RS: Oh yes!

NP: Tim you have a point, the subject, 56 seconds, rotten guests starting now.

TR: I once had some rotten guests to my humble abode. Johnny Rotten and his family! I was extremely worried about this because Iíd heard of the reputation of the said clan. I thought they might spit on the carpet, use foul language, torment the dog an ddestroy the wallpaper which had only recently been placed on several of the walls...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: I think there was a hesitation.

NP: Yes...

TR: No! Give over!

NP: No there was a hes... you couldnít remember where you placed your wallpaper.

TR: I was just thinking was wall a repetition of wallpaper and I decided not so I went ahead with confidence.

NP: But it was hesitation so Wendy you have another point, you have the subject of rotten guests, 36 seconds starting now.

WR: I have had my fair share of rotten guests. When my mother was alive, we had a bed and breakfast hotel. I know all about rotten guests. I know about the ones who sneak out in the morning without paying their bill...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: Know about she said twice.

NP: You, you repeated I know all about...

WR: Oh what a shame! It was a brilliant story!

NP: Well try and get in again Wendy and tell us more about it. Twenty-three seconds are left and itís Peter Jones on rotten guests starting now.

PJ: Well the guests that I think rotten are the ones to whom you say "please make yourself at home" and they do! And you canít get rid of them! Week after month, they stay there until they really take up residence like squatters. And theyíre, in particular...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: I thought he was a little hesitant.

NP: There was hesitation Richard...

PJ: Yes there was, there was.

NP: ..and you have another point and five seconds to tell us about rotten guests starting now.

RS: One of the worst things that rotten guests can do is not turn up at all. At least not at the time that you say they are to arrive...

WHISTLE

NP: And Richard Stilgoe was speaking as the whistle went, gained that all-important extra point. And heís now in second place behind Peter Jones, our leader. And Wendy itís your turn to begin. And the subject is what I like and you have 60 seconds to begin starting now.

WR: What I like best of all is listening to The Archers on a Sunday morning between 10.15 and 11. This is my most...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Deviation from the truth. The Archers is 10.15 to 11.15, not 10.15 to 11.

RS: But she only enjoys it from 10.15 to 11!

WR: I hadnít got as far as saying 15, had I?

TR: Yes, yes.

WR: How could I forget the last quarter hour? Itís always the most exciting.

TR: Exactly!

RS: In that case, repetition of 15!

WR: You canít win, can you!

NP: So what do we do? Whatís your challenge, Tim, it was er... deviation then, was it?

TR: Deviation, yes.

NP: Right, yes. Tim you have the subject of what I like and 53 seconds starting now.

TR: I like listening to The Archers. But what I like even more is tuning in and turning on to Neighbours, that fantastic Australian soap opera, an Antipodean delight. I am constantly amazed by the beautiful elocution, the wonderful...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard...

WR: Deviation, the manís talking rubbish!

NP: I think the audience applause endorses the correctness of your challenge Wendy! So you get a point for that...

WR: You should help yourself out. You see these people go home and they think you really do watch it!

TR: I do! I love it! Iím telling the truth!

WR: Iím sitting over there next time!

NP: Well I think that The Archers does desreve all the plugs that weíre giving it. So I think you do have quality. Thirty-eight seconds are left with you Wendy on what I like starting now.

WR: Apart from listening to The Archers, the other thing I like is our little pet cockateel Henry. She is...

BUZZ

WR: What?

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: She paused with emotion after mentioning Henry.

WR: Itís only because I forgot whether it was a he or a she. Thereís some confusion over little Henryís sex, thatís all.

NP: After all this time donít you know Wendy?

WR: Well we think itís a female.

RS: Why did you call it Henry?

WR: We thought it was a little boy. But now we think itís a little girl.

RS: Oh.

TR: Why...

PJ: Itís a very kind of bleak life that you seem to lead! When the high spots are listening to the Archers and cleaning out the parrotís cage!

NP: If any of our listeners have any ideas on how Wendy could improve the quality of her life, could you please put it on a postcard! But you do keep the subject of what I like and you have 31 seconds left starting now.

WR: The other things I like, apart from the aforesaid items and subjects are walking in the park, especially in the Autumn. I do like to see the leaves lying on the ground. I know they make a bit of a mess and some poor soul has to come along and sweep them up. But when you look at the varying shades of gold and red and brown and you see the bits falling off the trees and fluttering downwards, it really is a most wonderful sight. Especially if you live near er...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe, yes?

RS: Hesitation.

NP: Oh yes I had to hear just to be sure...

WR: I couldnít think of another word for park. I want to say Regentís Park. I couldnít, Iíd already said park, hadnít I.

RS: That would have been all right.

NP: I know, and if youíd kept going for one more second you would have got another point.

WR: Oh no!

NP: Yes!

WR: Oh dear!

NP: Richard got in with one second to go on what I like starting now.

RS: Sexing cockateels is what I like best.

WHISTLE

NP: So Richard Stilgoe was speaking as the whistle went, gained an extra point, heís now one point behind our leader who is still Peter Jones. Peter your turn to begin, the subject is ready money. Sixty seconds as always starting now.

PJ: Ready money is what Lane didnít have at the beginning of The Importance of Being Earnest when he was asked about cucumbers because they were preparing the sandwiches for Lady Bracknell. Ready money is a very handy thing to have as Ken Dodd has found out over the years. But sometimes it can be an embarrassment if you have too much of it locked up in the garden shed. Now Iíve never been terribly well-off ready money-wise. Iíd like to acquire some, and if anybody can make any suggestions after the show about ways in which I can earn a few quid, Iíd be very pleased to indulge them in a prolonged conversation. Iím not used to having very extended ones but I would be prepared to go on till say half past nine if necessary talking about ready money. If anybodyís got a suitcase full of it, I should be even more delighted. But alas, you look a poverty-stricken crowd and are fairly unhappy, I can think, with it. Otherwise you wouldnít be here!

WHISTLE

NP: Well Peter Iím delighted to see that ready money really inspired you! Itís the first time for a long time anyone, let alone Peter has kept going for the full 60 seconds without hesitation, repetition or deviating. And without being interrupted for any other reason. Youíre three ahead of Richard Stilgoe whoís in second place. And we carry on with Tim Rice to begin the next round and the subject is dentists. Give us painful or even different experiences on dentists starting now.

TR: It is amazing how many dentists are Australian. If you hear that particular Antipodean accent you can put almost every bit of ready money you have on the fact that this gent will be from the place I mentioned. Also coming from that are cockateels. But I digress and this is not something I would...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: If he digresses, digresses, I would imagine thatís deviation.

NP: Yes, heís admitting himself that he deviated. So Richard well listened, well challenged, a point more to you, 44 seconds on dentists starting now.

RS: The reason that Australians come over here and join the dental profession is because of a thing called bashing the gnash. This is a way of earning enormous quantities of money by being somebody arriving from another country who is already qualified and then joining the National Health. And you get paid more than ordinary dentists who qualified over here. I just said the word qualified twice.

BUZZ

RS: But itís jolly interesting though!

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Yes, two, two qualifieds.

NP: Yes yes they were too highly qualified there. Dentists is back with you Tim and 28 seconds are left starting now.

TR: I had an extremely trendy dentists back in the 70s who would plug in super earphones into his patient which was often me when I was there. And play sensational music while he slowly sends you out of your...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: You canít plug earphones into the patient!

TR: Well you can...

NP: Youíre absolutely right Peter. The mind boggles at the thought! Correct challenge, 16 seconds on dentists starting now.

PJ: Another trendy thing, theyíve done away with the chairs and now they have the patients lying down on their backs. And I think quite soon theyíll be lying on their stomachs....

BUZZ

NP: And Tim Rice challenged.

PJ: ...so they can have easier access to their wallets!

NP: Oh Peter! The joke was worth waiting for! But Tim did challenge you before you got to the payoff. What was it Tim?

TR: Two lyings.

NP: There were two lyings, Iím afraid.

PJ: Two lyings, lying.

NP: So Tim youíre back with seven seconds on dentists starting now.

TR: With music in my ears he would...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: Repetition of ears.

NP: Thatís right, they were plugged into your ears before and there was music in your ears this time. Richard, youíre catching up on our leader Peter Jones, you have five seconds on dentists starting now.

RS: I donít know whether itís the smell thatís worse or the noise of the drill. But that particular thing...

WHISTLE

NP: Richard Stilgoe was then speaking as the whistle went and gained that extra point again and heís now one behind our leader who is still Peter Jones. And Richard it is your turn to begin, the subject is old codgers. Will you tell us something about that subject in this game starting now.

RS: It was one of the Sunday papers, I canít remember which itís name was, but they used to answer their letters...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: That was wrong, it wasnít the Sunday paper, it was The Daily Mirror.

RS: Oh. All right! Well at least I know now.

NP: The Daily Mirror talked about the old codgers did it. Right, well done Wendy, Iím glad you read your newspaper, 55 seconds on old codgers starting now.

WR: I used to read the Old Codgers column in The Daily Mirror. They used to have people write in with various obscure requests and... asking...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Hesitation.

NP: Hesitation on the requests and there are 45 seconds left, old codgers with you Tim starting now.

TR: Iím at an extremely interesting phase of my life, between being a juvenile dynamo and an old codger. It is extremely difficult to relate to this situation. Itís called the mid-life crisis and I can tell you, one and all, itís hell. You are not getting the sympathy you deserve from your fellow workers or indeed from the public. You are too old to be young and loved and too young...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged. Wendy your challenge?

WR: I think we had two too youngs, didnít we?

TR: Yes sorry.

NP: Yes indeed we did. Twenty-one seconds, old codgers starting now.

WR: The Old Codgers item in the newspaper I mentioned before was really interesting because they dealt with such varied queries as I said from people who would purchase...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Repetition.

WR: Of what?

NP: Of what?

TR: Well you said as I said, so you must have repeated something!

NP: She didnít actually repeat anything, she said as I said but she was using different words...

TR: Ah she...

NP: ...to express that thought before.

TR: Oh well, sorry.

NP: So you keep the subject Wendy, another point, nine seconds, old codgers starting now.

WR: There are some lovely elderly chaps come into our local we refer to as the old codgers. Theyíre from the Royal Hospital in Chelsea and theyíre an absolutely splendid band of gentlemen...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Wendy Richard not only got a point for speaking as the whistle went but gained a number of points in that round and has leapt forward from fourth to third place. And as we go into the last round itís a very interesting situation. Only one point separates each competitor. And we move into the last round with tension and the subject is pets. And Wendy it is your turn to begin. So cockateel away if you wish starting now.

WR: I used to have a pet dog, a little poodle that I had for 12 and a half years. And then I also had a pussycat which I called Pussy because I was very imaginative...

BUZZ

NP: Um, Tim Rice...

TR: Two pussies.

WR: One word is hyphenated, the other wordís a name. Itís a name, it has a capital P.

NP: Pussycat. I suppose pussycat isnít hyphenated or anything is it?

WR: Yes but Pussy...

PJ: Some cats are!

RS: Yes!

WR: ... the second Pussy was with a capital P (starts laughing)

NP: If youíd said a hyphenated pussycat then we would have known. Right Tim I give you the benefit of the doubt and there are 50 seconds left on pets starting now.

TR: I have an enormous dog named Tyson who is a boxer. This is an extremely witty play on words. But it suits him, he is a vicious beast. I would like to inform anybody in the audience after some ready money from my house not to come near because this animal will tear you from limb to arm! Or may!

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: Hesitation.

NP: Yeah hesitation yes, from limb to arm. Wendy...

TR: Story of my life.

NP: Itís justice, you got the subject back, 29 seconds on pets starting now.

WR: After my other pets died, I got a pet cockateel called Little Henry who is the love of my life. He or she...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: Iím sorry, she corrected it.

NP: Wendy gets another point for the interruption and she has 20 seconds to continue on pets starting now.

WR: Can fly around our flat whenever.... they wish...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Well thereís only one bird as far as I can gather. Itís confusing, I think the bird itself is probably in some doubt about the thing. She just said they fly around.

NP: You did indeed, yes. Tim you have a correct challenge, I give it to you, pets back with you, 19 seconds starting now.

TR: It is not widely known that there are several pets in this country that are illegal. You are not allowed to keep...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Itís very widely known indeed!

NP: How do you judge on that? Is it widely known or not widely known...

PJ: Of course it is, the audience know it is! Of course it is.

NP: I will put it to the superior wisdom and judgement of our delightful audience. Will you please if you agree with Peterís challenge, cheer for Peter. And if you disagree then you boo for Tim Rice and you do it all together now.

CHEERS AND BOOS FROM THE AUDIENCE

NP: I think the cheers had it which means they agree with Peter that most people do know that. Fourteen seconds, pets starting now.

PJ: The thing I donít like about having a pet is that one has to leave it at home occasionally or farm it out somewhere. There are little hotels, I know, that you can leave these animals at...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Stilgoe challenged.

RS: Two leaves.

PJ: Oh thatís right, yes.

NP: Yes indeed.

RS: Sorry itís a very short word.

NP: I know, itís all very tense, itís very equal and three seconds left with Richard Stilgoe on pets starting now.

RS: The Stilgoes family dog is called Patrick and he is a yellow Labrador. A lot of people refer...

WHISTLE

NP: Well weíve reached the end of the show. We have in second place a pairing of Tim Rice and Wendy Richard. But only one point behind our joint winners, Richard Stilgoe and Peter Jones. What could be fairer, the result? It only remains for me to say thank you to all four of them for the wonderful contribution they make towards the success of our programme. I also wish to thank Anne Ling whoís kept the score and blown her whistle so magnificently beside me. And of course Ian Messiter who created the game and our producer who makes sure we all toe the line so magnificently. And from me Nicholas Parsons we hope youíve enjoyed Just A Minute and will want to tune in again the next time we take to the air and play this game. Until then from all of us here goodbye.

THEME MUSIC