JAM:PMerton,DNimmo,PJones,TRice
WELCOME TO JUST A MINUTE!

starring PAUL MERTON, DEREK NIMMO, PETER JONES and TIM RICE, chaired by NICHOLAS PARSONS (Radio, 25 April 1989)

NOTE: This was the first show recorded by Paul Merton.


NICHOLAS PARSONS: Welcome to Just A Minute!

THEME MUSIC

NP: Hello my name is Nicholas Parsons. And as the Minute Waltz fades away once more it is my pleasure to introduce to you the four exciting and entertaining personalities who this week are going to play Just A Minute. We welcome back Derek Nimmo and Peter Jones and Tim Rice. And for the first time we welcome Paul Merton. Will you please welcome all four of them! As usual I will ask them if they will speak on the subject I will give them and they will try and do that without hesitation, repetition or deviating from the subject. Beside me sits Ian Messiter, the creator of the game with a stopwatch in his left hand, a whistle in his right hand which he will blow when 60 seconds are up. Weíll begin the show this week with Peter Jones. Peter the subject is pinching. Will you tell us something about that in Just A Minute starting now.

PETER JONES: What a very interesting man, Sir Thomas or Toby Pinching. Once he left the monastery, he started a pottery factory in the five...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice has challenged.

TIM RICE: Um, lack of a main verb. I mean we sort of...

NP: I beg your pardon?

PJ: Whatís that?

TR: Was a very interesting man, Thomas or Toby. I didnít quite gather where it was one bloke or two...

PJ: What is the challenge?

TR: The challenge is incomprehensibility...

NP: Well that is...

TR: In other words deviation.

NP: I think you have to keep going under pressure and we just started the show so I would disagree entirely Tim with the challenge. So Peter gets a point for an incorrect challenge, keeps the subject, 49 seconds are left starting now.

PJ: He started up this little factory in the very shadow of Josiah Wedgwoodís similar establishment. But he started making...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DEREK NIMMO: He started twice.

NP: Yes he started..

PJ: Well he did actually, itís interesting!

NP: But in Just A Minute, he cannot, you cannot repeat the word which you did unfortunately Peter. So Derek Nimmo gets in and got a point for a correct challenge, takes over the subject of pinching and there are 41 secinds left starting now.

DN: The most awful thing about buying a new pair of shoes is when you find that they are pinching. The former Marquis of Bath solved the problem by getting his first footman always to wear his shoes in for him. And anyway Iíve managed...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Iím surprised that Tim Rice didnít find this incomprehensible! I found it incomprehensible and Iím sitting next to him!

NP: He was going at a cracking pace.

DN: I, Iím going rather rapidly because if I go slowly, youíd challenged. If I go, I try to get a little..

PJ: What was that?

DN: A head of steam up! I canít help it if youíre getting a bit deaf, poor old fellow!

NP: I think...

DN: I mean 20 years ago you were quite quick on the uptake! Iíve been sitting next to him for 20 years! And I now have to cup my hands and shout in his left ear all the time!


NP: Peter I disagree with the challenge. So Derek Nimmo continues with pinching, 29 seconds are left starting now.

DN: So when Pinching started his factory in the potteries near Stoke-on-Trent, he actually stole the designs of Wedgwood and thatís why it was called Pinching. Which is a frightfully interesting fact that not everybody...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton has challenged.

PAUL MERTON: Didnít Wedgwood make plates?

NP: He did make plates, yes.

PM: Well how would a shoe manufacturer pinch designs... Unless thatís just me being thick, of course!

NP: Well no I mean er I donít think heíd established that. I think thatís such a good challenge we have to give it to you Paul. And you get a point for that and you have 20 seconds to tell us something about pinching starting now.

PM: Pinching or nicking is a... term that...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Put him in his place! Er!

NP: Derek...

PM: How dare you!

NP: That is one of the meanest challenges! That is the first time that Paul Merton has opened his mouth on Just A Minute, and he had three words out and you came straight in there, like, as sharp as a knife. And all Iím going to say is I thought it was an unfair challenge even if it was correct. And say Paul you have a point for that and you continue with pinching and 16 seconds are left starting now.

PM: Thereís a piece of Cockney slang that...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged again.

DN: Repetition of Cockney slang.

PM: I thought I said that after the buzzer the first time.

DN: No you didnít.

NP: You get some idea of how the game is played now, even if youíre a new boy on the show you get no quarter Iím afraid. Derek Nimmo keeps, sorry, gets the subject back again, pinching, 14 seconds left starting now.

DN: It is awfully mean to pinch...

BUZZ

NP: And Paul Merton has challenged.

PM: Repetition of the English language.

NP: I donít mind what you say, Paul, I quite agree with the challenge. And you have the subject of pinching back and 12 seconds to go starting now.

PM: Old time Londoners used to use these phrases as a piece of underground talking. When they didnít want the policemen to know what they were saying, they would say "call the esclops" which is backwards slang for er "look thereís..."

WHISTLE

NP: When Ian Messiter blows his whistle it tells us that 60 seconds are up and whoever is speaking at that moment gains an extra point. On this occasion it was our first-time guest Paul Merton and you will be pleased to know and interested to hear heís in the lead at the end of the first round. Tim Rice, will you take the second round, the subject riddles. Will you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

TR: Riddles are a harmless form of enjoyment for the simple minded. I recall a very early one...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Iíd just like to say I like them!

TR: Well... that proves my point!

NP: So what do I do there? Give Paul a bonus, we liked his challenge but the subject still remains with Tim who gets a point for being interrupted and he has 54 seconds to continue with riddles starting now.

TR: Which simpleton can fail to trill with glee hearing the riddle: when is a door not something that you walk through and open and shut again when you leave the room? The answer is when it is a...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Three whens.

NP: I...

TR: Oh give over!

NP: I remember there was one show in which you said it was very unfair for Tim Rice to challenge when someone was in the middle of a joke or a saying or an aphorism or something...

DN: Oh was it? Was it a joke? Iím so sorry! I retract!

NP: No it was a riddle that was supposed to get a humorous response, even though everybody knew what the answer was. But it was a correct challenge and so you have to have the subject and 41 seconds on riddles starting now.

DN: Of course riddles canít always be pleasant and have not been in times past. When one thinks of Thebes and outside that city was the Sphinx. Now, not the one that was in Egypt, but set that terrible riddle: What has four legs, two legs and three...

BUZZ

NP: And Tim Rice has challenged.

TR: Legs Iím sorry.

DN: Yes.

NP: Yes there were too many legs Iím sorry Derek. Um Tim you have the subject back, there are 25 seconds left for riddles starting now.

TR: Why did the chicken cross the road? I hear you cry, the answer very simple indeed. Because it wanted to get or progress to the other side. But as an alternative answer to this age-old question, viz: because it saw the zebra crossing. I personally prefer the first traditional answer to one of these great riddles of our time. There are some subjects which one talks about in which...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Tim Rice got points in that round including one for speaking as the whistle went. And heís moved into third place, heís one behind Derek Nimmo, whoís one behind Paul Merton whoís still our leader, and Peter Jones is trailing a little. And I think it is Derekís turn to begin. Derek the subject is rope tricks. Will you tell us something about that in the game starting now.

DN: (drawing out his words) I remember being in the outer suburbs of Bombay. And there I esquired a fakir with his rope, which he was trying to get to rise high into the air. He had a flute in one hand...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Why is he talking funny?

NP: I donít know, I think thatís a very good question. In other words deviation from his normal speech.

PM: Indeed yes.

NP: Yes indeed yes. So Paul you have another point and you have 43 secodns for rope tricks starting now.

PM: I know a magician who could do several good rope tricks. One was to make the rope go down to the shops and do the shopping for him. Um another...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Why is he going er and talking funny?

NP: Because in Just A Minute thatís hesitation and youíve got the subject back Derek with 35 seconds on rope tricks starting now.

DN: Well he went to Piccadilly Circus and he found these chaps working on the road, about to start and so he gave one a rope and took it right round the centre of the circus which I said before...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Hesitation.

DN: Oh hesitation, well I did say circus, thatís a better challenge, a cleaner challenge, I thought, circus twice.

PJ: Circus, all right, all right.

DN: Go for your life, I donít mind.

PJ: Oh all right, all right. No, Iíll challenge whatever you say Derek.

NP: Have you two stopped having a chat among yourselves?

PJ: What?

NP: Can we get on with the show?

PJ: Yes of course, yes.

NP: Peter I agree with your challenge, 22 seconds on rope tricks starting now.

PJ: You hear a lot about Indian rope tricks. But there are others like the South American rope trick of the scout shows. They have a rope and each man has two balls which he attaches to the end of the rope and twirls it around his head and hurls it at cows and other four-legged creatures and manages to capture them thus. Now this is extremely difficult. Itís more..

WHISTLE

NP: So Peter, that resounding round of applause from our audience shows that they not only enjoyed what you said but the fact that you kept going until the whistle went and you kept another point. And you are equal in third place with Tim Rice, just behind Derek Nimmo and out in the lead is Paul Merton, one ahead of Derek. And he begins the next round. Paul the first subject on which youíre going to talk in Just A Minute is bimboes. I donít know whether you have any personal experience of them but will you tell us something about them in this game starting now.

PM: My girlfriend is a bimbo. She is one of these people who believes that cats are real human beings in tiny little fur suits. So the cats...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Well itís very tasteless, I find it offensive. But that was not my challenge. My challenge was hesitation.

NP: Iím afraid it was a little bit of hesitation there so I have to be a bit more firm now. I will give you the benefit of the doubt when I can, but I donít think I could there. So Tim you have 50 seconds to tell us something about bimboes starting now.

TR: Bimboes are...

BUZZ

NP: And Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Iíd like to be given the benefit of the doubt!

NP: Iíll give you a bonus point for the challenge which I enjoyed very much but I canít give you the benefit of the doubt. And Tim gets one for being challenged and he gets 48 seconds to continue with bimboes starting now.

TR: Bimboes are a comparatively recent phenomenon. If you said to somebody "what is a bimbo?" five or even only three years ago they would have said "what are you talking about, cock?" or words to that effect. And the reason is not hard to discover. This word was invented by politicians or by journalists following politics in the United States of America in order to do down perfectly decent politicians...

BUZZ

NP: And Paul Merton got in first.

PM: Er repetition of politicians.

NP: Thatís right, well listened. And he knew heíd done it because he paused afterwards. So Paul you have another point, you have 24 seconds to tell us something about bimboes starting now.

PM: Rod Stewart is well-known for going out with bimboes. They seem to be the er er...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Iím afraid an er.

NP: Iím afraid youíre right, yes, 15 seconds for you Tim Rice on bimboes starting now.

TR: Bimbo, what cher gonna do-e-o was the first line of a song popular in about 1954. I never discovered...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: Well he told us a minute ot two ago that it hadnít been used until the last three or four years!

NP: Well listened Peter! So you get the subject with six seconds on bimboes starting now.

PJ: Theyíre usually young ladies who are more famous for their physical charms...

BUZZ

NP: Derek...

PJ: ...than for their intellectual abilities. Now I wish I had longer to expand on this subject but alas we have to go home in about half an hour, donít we! What?

NP: Itís all right, weíve gone over time. But actually Tim challenged you with one second to go. What was your challenge Tim?

TR: Well I thought there was a hesitation.

PJ: No there wasnít. How could there be a hesitation when I only had to speak for six seconds? Ridiculous!

NP: Iím afraid there was Peter but Iím not going to give it against you. Iím going to be generous to you and tell you youíve got one second to go on bimboes starting now.

PJ: I rather like them!

WHISTLE

NP: Well that gives a nice even score at the end of that round. Derek Nimmo for once is in fourth place one point behind Peter Jones whoís one point behind Tim Rice whoís one point behind Paul Merton. And Peter your turn to begin, the subject is supermarkets. Will you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

PJ: Theyíre the places that people like to go to shop, although most of the public will say they prefer a little corner shop with a little old man...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice has challenged.

TR: Repetition of shops.

NP: Yes.

PJ: Was there?

NP: Yes those were the shops that people like to go to shop. If you repeat the word...

PJ: Youíd have thought Tim Rice would be interested enough in what I was going to say to want to hang on! I canít understand it you see.

NP: Well a lot of us would have thought that too Peter...

PJ: Yes!

NP: But Iím afraid he challenged...

PJ: Amazing!

NP: And I have to be fair within the game. I try to keep a balance...

PJ: I know youíre trying hard all the time! I know itís tough! Breaking my heart what with you and his...

NP: And you can be trying as well on occasions Peter but I wonít emphasise that. So Tim you have a correct challenge, 51 seconds, supermarkets starting now.

TR: I want to break my talk on supermarkets into five or six sections and I want you to follow extremely carefully. Point one about...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of one.

NP: No he said five different things didnít he? He didnít say one.

TR: Five or six, I said, not one.

NP: Tim you get another point for that, for an incorrect challenge and you have 43 seconds on supermarkets starting now.

TR: First I would like to consider the achitecture in...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: He did repeat I would like. I would like to put in...

TR: I said I want the first time. Actually...

NP: No I would like, Iím afraid you did say I would like.

TR: Yes.

PJ: Well let him get on with the first one because weíve got five more!

NP: I thought he was being a bit ambitious in 60 seconds to give us all five points!

PJ: Over-confident altogether!

NP: Yes! Derek I agree with that challenge, 40 seconds on supermarkets starting now.

DN: My wife always insists on me accompanying her to a supermarket and she always gives me a...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Always, Iím sorry.

NP: Yes always, she always er did er too much didnít she. Thirty-five seconds for you Tim, back with supermarkets starting now.

TR: Fifthly, are there too many supermarkets...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: I think Iíve gone to sleep there. I missed points two through to four!

NP: Yes well that was the fifth one, wasnít it?

PM: Yes!

NP: Well I donít think he has to take them...

PJ: I donít think you missed much frankly!

PM: I would have liked to have seen him follow the theme through, nevertheless, having...

NP: Yeah I know but he wasnít able to do it in Just A Minute. For some reason he jumped to number 5, maybe because thereís only 35 seconds left. But it wasnít a correct challenge Paul, so Tim still has the subject, 32 seconds, supermarkets starting now.

TR: And finally to sum up everything Iíve been telling you, I would like to point out that supermarkets are a vital strand of our society. Where else can people meet on equal terms...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: In a pub!

NP: Give him a point...

TR: I was going to answer the question myself. It was a rhetorical question.

PM: I gave a rhetorical answer!

NP: And Tim, Paul got another point, Tim gets a point for being interrupted, keeps the subject, 22 seconds with you Tim, supermarkets starting now.

TR: Really? I won that one, did I? How amazing! What wonderful chairmanship!

BUZZ

NP: Yes Peter? Deviation?

PJ: That wasnít talking about supermarkets.

NP: Absolutely! He wasnít talking...

PJ: He was deviating.

NP: Absolutely Peter, I quite agree, well listened. Nineteen seconds for you to tell us something about supermarkets, the subject you started with and lost about half an hour ago, and um 19 seconds left starting now.

PJ: Is a supermarket trolley in your garden a status symbol? Because there are lots of them in our road. Different kinds. Obviously people are using these big emporiums and buying things and then they put babies and old rubbish and stuff in to the er...

WHISTLE

NP: So itís still a close contest with Derek Nimmo trailing Peter Jones trailing Paul Merton trailing Tim Rice. And Tim your turn to begin, the subject, sharks. Will you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

TR: Sharks have been the inspiration for a good many motion pictures or movies for our American listeners...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Name five!

TR: Jaws One, Jaws Two, Jaws Three, Jaws Four, Jaws Five!

NP: I think heís answered you! So Tim, another point to you, incorrect challenge, sharks and 54 seconds starting now.

TR: Such as Jaws One, Two, Three, Four, Five and I am certain movie makers soon will be coming up with...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of movie makers.

NP: No, it was movies before. It wasnít movie makers.

TR: Well spotted chairman!

NP: So Tim you still have the subject, 47 seconds on sharks starting now.

TR: The shark is a beautiful but menacing animal. It has been described as a machine for eating because...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Isnít it a mammal rather than an animal?

TR: A mammal is an animal.

NP: No I donít think so.

TR: It is! All mammals are animals, but not all animals are mammals.

DN: Of course a mammals an animal you great...

NP: Oh I see, there we are, we learn something every day...

PM: Itís a new lyric for you though isnít it. Mammals and animals!

NP: So he was still correct, 41 seconds left for you Tim on sharks starting now.

TR: Iím having great difficulty getting into my stride with this topic. But I would like to get back to my main thesis and I want to deal with it in six parts! Firstly, the teeth of the shark. These are venomous, vicious and extremely unpleasant. Woe betide...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Theyíre not venomous are they, because the, the teeth would be filled with venom...

NP: Abdolutely, thereís no, thereís no venom. They are very dangerous and very vicious but not necessarily venomous. It shows the erudition of some comedians and Paul Merton has brought it to good use in Just A Minute and heís got the subject of sharks and 28 seconds starting now.

PM: I once owned several sharks. I kept them at the bottom of the garden in a very small pond. Consequently they didnít last very long. They died after about two minutes which I donít think is long enough to really appreciate a pet. Now some people, they own sharks, they keep them in the Atlantic Ocean. Now this is much more sensible, because in a sea that size itís easier to keep them under control, which doesnít mean anything at all but I donít think that er...

BUZZ

NP: Oh that wretch beside you Paul got in with half a second to go. What was it?

TR: I donít think thatís erudition at all. I think the man was struggling from the moment he opened his mouth! Hesitation, deviation...

NP: No it wasnít...

TR: ...outright lies! You name it!

NP: Now what is...

PM: Thatís deviation!

NP: What is your, what is your challenge?

TR: Deviation, a pack of lies from start to finish!

NP: Was your challenge deviation?

TR: No, no, of course not! No, no, no, no. My challenge was... um...

NP: Youíve forgotten!

TR: He, he, he sort of got lost...

NP: He certainly wasnít deviating, no he wasnít deviating. What you failed to say was he did actually say er with half a second to go...

TR: Hesitation!

NP: No itís too late now, Iím very sorry and youíre out in the lead and you can afford to be generous. So Paul still has the subject of sharks with half a second to go starting now.

PM: Da-dum!

WHISTLE

NP: So our first time guest on the show Paul Merton is keeping up with our leader Tim Rice. Heís only two points behind him, then comes Peter Jones and then Derek Nimmo in that order. And Derek begins the next round and the subject Derek is stick of rock. Will you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

DN: I shall never forget consuming my first stick of rock. I left Speak Airport near Liverpool in a small biplane and flew to Blackpool. Then wandering along the promenade past the deck chairs and people with jolly little handkerchiefs on their heads with knots around them I cam to the tower. And inside and all around were people selling sticks of rock. "What are they, I pray?" I said to my father, because I was a very respectful child as you can imagine. And he said "donít be so silly son, they are sticks of rock". I said "could I have one?" He said "here you are" and gave me a half penny. And I went over to the nearest vendor and said "please sir, could I have a stick of rock?" I quickly tore off the paper and there was a wonderfully minty aroma wafting through the air. And I spied the letters which said "I love you". And I chewed away and it still said exactly the same...

BUZZ

DN: ...And I then had another nibble and then... what?

NP: Paul Merton challenged with one second...

PM: I just thought somebody should stop him!

NP: He should have been stopped years ago! But... what is your challenge other than that Paul?

PM: Ah none, just human regard really!

NP: Human regard. Well he had one second to go, he nearly achieved that er...

PM: Oh Iím sorry.

NP: ...personal success for speaking for 60 seconds without being challenged. It was an incorrect challenge Derek so you get a point for that, and you still keep the subject so youíll finish up with more points. And one second on stick of rock starting now.

DN: My second stick of rock came from Brighton...

WHISTLE

NP: So Derek Nimmo got two points in that round, one for being interrupted, one for speaking as the whistle went. Heís now equal in third place with Peter Jones, then above them comes Paul Merton who begins the next round and heís trailing our leader Tim Rice. Paul, the subject is nerds. Can you tell us something about that in Just A Minute starting now.

PM: I suppose this is the male equivalent of the bimbo. It seems to be a word that was conjured round about the same time. I know there have been films made, certainly released in America. There was one movie called Revenge of the Nerds which is, a nerd is a person who wears glasses, his ears stick out...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice has challenged.

TR: If all this is true, then they are in no way the equivalent of bimboes. Bimboes are highly attractive...

PJ: Itís not their ears that stick out, is it?

PM: But they, but they are similar in that they both are sort of like um not very well blessed with mental ability.

NP: I think that was the point you were trying to make...

TR: Well he failed to make it!

NP: Yes! Well youíd better make it, yes. I mean physically I agree they, their attributes are different. But I think he established in my mind that their mental capacities were similar.

TR: Right.

NP: And so there, you keep the subject Paul, 42 seconds left starting now.

PM: It seems to me that there is somebody going around the world inventing new words for us to use all the time. You have nerds, yuppies was one which was a few years before that. But a nerd to me is somebody who has no idea whatís going on around them at all. They tend to be the person at the back of the class who has no idea...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice has challenged.

TR: Two no ideas.

PM: Yes.

NP: Yes Iím afraid so. So Tim you have a correct challenge there, you have the subject of nerds, there are 22 seconds left starting now.

TR: I have a sneaking sympathy for people characterised as nerds. I think that their apparent stupidity amd moronic gape in fact hides a keen intensity and a transparently easy to see shyness...

BUZZ

TR: Iím talking a load of absolute cobblers here!

NP: So Paul Merton challenged, what was your...

PM: You canít hide an easy to see shyness!

TR: Well spotted!

NP: Well spotted and well listened and seven seconds for you Paul on nerds starting now.

PM: When a group of nerds get together, this is known as a collection of nerds or in other words, a nerd...

WHISTLE

NP: Well we have an interesting situation. Paul Merton took the subject of nerds, got points during the round and also got that extra one for speaking as the whistle went and heís now equal in the lead with Tim Rice and this is the last round coming up. So it is interesting to see what the final situation will be. And to begin the last round it is Peter Jones. And Peter itís your turn, Austrian cakes. I know you love sweet things and pastries. Will you tell us something about them in this game starting now.

PJ: The best known one I suppose is the saccher torte which is manufactured...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Never heard of it!

PJ: Well... what can one say to that?

NP: What is your challenge then?

PM: Well itís er not the best known of all Austrian cakes.

NP: Well it doesnít matter, the subject is not the best known Austrian cake...

PJ: What do you think is the best known Austrian cake?

PM: The Franz Josef sponge!

NP: Thatís a good reply, weíve had a bit of fun. If we could get back to Just A Minute, incorrect challenge, Peter has another point, 56 seconds left on Austrian cakes Peter starting now.

PJ: Manufactured by the people who run the hotel of the same name. Now thereís a shop in Vienna called Daemels where they have every kind of patisserie and French pastry and other sort of things with a lot of goo...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Weíre talking about Austrian cakes, not French pastries.

NP: But it was established that this place was in Vienna.

TR: Yes, so what?

NP: Therefore he was in Austria and talking about the fact that there were all sorts of patisseries there. So um 43 um seconds, weíre still with you Peter on Austrian cakes starting now.

PJ: Thereís one Austrian cake in particular that has a kind of sandy texture. And you buy it, itís in the shape of a ring. And you put fruit in it with cream on the top, itís frightfully bad for you of course. Naughty but nice was a phrase that sprang to mind when I was mentioning this cake because that was the phrase they used er in advertising...

BUZZ

NP: Tim Rice challenged.

TR: Two phrases.

NP: Yes! Heíd almost run out of steam!

TR: I thought he was doing rather well on that.

NP: Tim you have a correct challenge on Austrian cakes, you have 24 seconds to talk on the subject starting now.

TR: (speaks in German) That is the phrase that springs to mind every time I eat an Austrian cake, mainly because itís the only line of German I know! And the first time I heard those wonderful words, I was stinking... sticky...

BUZZ

NP: Ah! Derek Nimmo challenged!

DN: Hesitation.

NP Hesitation Derek, you have nine seconds to tell us something about Austrian cakes starting...

DN: When I looked for my perfect Austrian cake, I boarded the Orient Express with my favourite bimbo. And I got off and booked in Salzberg for a...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Derek Nimmo kept going and had a nice joke at the end as the whistle went and gained an extra point. And Iíll now have to give you the final situation. Well the two longest playing members of Just A Minute, Derek Nimmo and Peter Jones finished together in third place equal on points. In second place was the man whoís only played the game once before and weíve all enjoyed his contribution tremendously. He very nearly won, that is Paul Merton. But one point ahead of him is the man we adjudge to be the winner this week, Tim Rice! We do hope youíve enjoyed this edition of Just A Minute. And it only remains for me to say on behalf of our four, Tim Rice, Paul Merton, Derek Nimmo and Peter Jones, thank you very much for tuning in. And also on behalf of the creator of the game, Ian Messiter who sits beside me and our producer who sits ahead of me, well in a little glass panel actually, and that is Edward Taylor, and myself Nicholas Parsons, thank you for your appreciation and joining the show and I hope youíll want to tune in again at the same time when we take to the air and we play Just A Minute. Until then from all of us here, good-bye.

THEME MUSIC