JAM:DNimmo,CFreud,WRichard,AMcGowan
WELCOME TO JUST A MINUTE!

starring DEREK NIMMO, CLEMENT FREUD, WENDY RICHARD and ALISTAIR McGOWAN, chaired by NICHOLAS PARSONS (Radio, 13 February 1993)

NOTE: Alistair McGowan's only appearance.


NICHOLAS PARSONS: Welcome to Just A Minute.

THEME MUSIC

NP: Hello my name is Nicholas Parsons. And as the Minute Waltz fades away once more it is my pleasure to welcome the four panelists this week who are going to play Just A Minute. And we welcome back three of our regular players of the game, Wendy Richard, Clement Freud and Derek Nimmo. And we welcome someone who has never played the game before, Alistair McGowan. Would you please welcome all four of them! As always I will ask our four panellists to speak on the subject I will give them and they will try and do that without hesitation, repetition or deviating from the subject on the card. And we will begin the show this week with Clement Freud. Clement a delightful subject to begin this particular show, farmers. Will you tell us something about farmers in Just A Minute starting now.

CLEMENT FREUD: I don’t really know a great deal about farmers. Other than that if they come from France, they pick up barricades and throw them at the police. They also tend to set fire to vans that bring British mutton over the....

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WENDY RICHARD: Hesitation.

NP: Yes that was a hesitation Wendy. So there are 43 seconds left and you start now.

WR: My favourite farmers are those that are in The Archers. I listen every Sunday morning to the omnibus edition. Phil Archer is one of the most...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

WR: It was Archers twice.

CF: Mmmm.

NP: Two Archers yes. Farmers is back with you Clement, there are 34 seconds left and you start now.

CF: Some of my very best friends are farmers. All around Cambridgeshire, Whistelsea, Wisbeach, March, Chatteris, Littleport, Ely and the villages of Metle and Sutton abound with farmers. Jolly jovial people who go into the pub at lunchtime and drink pints of beer followed by small whiskies and large gins. They drive Mercedes because life has been good to them. Sugarleaf is wonderful, wrapesea brings them in much money in all sorts of currencies because at the moment...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Clement Freud there went with great style until the whistle went and whoever is speaking at that moment gains an extra point. Alistair McGowan welcome to the show, would you take the second round which is the Beatles. Would you tell us something about them in Just A Minute starting now.

ALISTAIR McGOWAN: It seems hard to believe now that four small insects from Liverpool could have set the pop world alight as they did in the 1960s. I think it was thanks to their manager of course, Brian Epstein, the man who turned them from the small hardback creatures into the mop-heads celebrated today across the world. One of their songs however has been grossly misunderstood over the years and is of course the song Michelle My Belle, which does not refer to a girl or a girlfriend but in fact the hard crustacean-like shape on the back of the insect’s creature, thus...

BUZZ

AM: ...giving the name My Shell! (starts to laugh)

NP: Wendy Richard.

WR: We had two backs, didn’t we?

NP: Yes he had two backs, I’m sorry Alistair. There are 29 seconds for you Wendy, Beatles, starting now.

WR: I remember going to a Beatles concert at Hammersmith. You couldn’t hear for a word for girls screaming and shrieking. Some of them were carried out by a St John’s Ambulance. Thank heavens for them because they obviously were in need of them. I...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Three thems.

NP: There were three thems I’m afraid, Wendy, yes. Fourteen seconds left with you Clement starting now.

CF: I met the Beatles when they were playing the Bull Ring in Madrid in 1966. And it was a wonderful night, an occasion which I shall remember until the end of my days. They were called Paul, Ringo, John...

WHISTLE

NP: Well at the end of that round Clement Freud was again speaking as the whistle went. And Derek it’s your turn to begin, the subject plugs. Will you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

DEREK NIMMO: Whenever I visit French farmers I always find that they’ve stolen the plugs out of the washbasin. So I often take reserves in my pocket because it’s very embarrassing and indeed, complicated, may I say difficult to have a bath when there’s no plug...

BUZZ

NP: Alistair challenged.

AM: Hesitation on the word may.

NP: Oh no, yes...

AM: Slurring?

NP: He was slurring, swallowing, yes...

CF: We think so, yes.

WR: We agree.

NP: ...but he didn’t actually hesitate Alistair.

WR: We agree with him. Clement and I both think that Derek did hesitate.

NP: He did manage to...

DN: Stop putting your oar in!

CF: Good challenge!

NP: He somehow vocally managed to keep going without actually hesitating and I try to be fair to everybody. So Derek you have the benefit of the doubt, you have 47...

CF: Is this new? Is this a new departure?

NP: What?

CF: You trying to be fair!

NP: Derek you have the benefit of the doubt, 47 seconds on plugs starting now.

DN: The European Community has changed the electrical system of wires when you’re putting in a plug. Beforehand the live one used to be red, and you could sense the danger. Now it’s turned brown which is the coloir of the earth which farmers like. And I always feel that this is not such a good idea. And a green and a yellow one is also a different shade than it was before and we now have a blue. So when I put in a plug, into a socket, I have to do all this electrical work and I never feel frightfully safe...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy challenged.

WR: He said electric twice, didn’t he.

NP: Yes he did.

WR: Electrical.

NP: Wendy you have 17 seconds on plugs starting now.

WR: I’m actually very good about putting plugs on. But now I’m married, I don’t see why I should have to do it myself. So I pretend to my husband that I really am quite useless at putting plugs on and get him to do it...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Putting plugs on twice.

NP: She’s putting... she never said where she put them on though, did she. Clement, four seconds, plugs starting now.

CF: Just A Minute is a very good programme! I would like to...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Clement’s plug for Just A Minute kept him going until the whistle went and gained him an extra point. And he’s in the lead at the end of that round. And Alistair it’s your turn to begin and the subject is cardigan. Will you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

AM: When a young man reaches the age of about 28 he is faced with a sartorial dilemna. Because at certain points in his life he’ll be passing a shop and suddenly become interested in the sight of a cardigan. But should he buy it or should he not? Because he knows that when he does purchase such a garment and put it on he will immediately gain 15 years in his age. I faced this dilemna several times as you can tell by my outfit today. Er um er bleurgh er um bleurgh...

BUZZ

AM: I got carried away really there, didn’t I!

NP: Bad luck Alistair, Derek got in, 37 seconds, Derek, cardigan starting now.

DN: It is really quite extraordinary I think that the Seventh Earl of Cardigan should be remembered for a little woolly rather than the fact that he led the charge of the Light Brigade. Now old Wellington and his boot, one can understand. When someone who had such a dismal disaster should have a cardigan named after him...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: He did hesitate.

NP: Yes I agree, I agree Wendy. Nineteen seconds for you to tell us something about cardigan starting now.

WR: I play the character of Pauline who is well known for her cardigans. I’ve actually grown very fond of these cardigans over the past seven and a half years. I believe that while I was away, supposedly in New Zealand, a character called Mrs Hewitt gave my cardigan away...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of character.

NP: Yes.

WR: Oh!

NP: Three seconds for you Derek on cardigan starting now.

DN: Cardigan Bay I think is one of the most lovely parts...

WHISTLE

NP: So at the end of that round Derek was speaking as the whistle went, he gained an extra point. But he’s still only in second place behind Clement Freud and then comes Wendy Richard and Alistair McGowan. Wendy, your turn to begin, the subject, nothing. Can you tell us something about nothing in Just A Minute starting now.

WR: I know nothing about anything which is patently obvious to the audience when they see me and hear me trying to play this game. I could become quite an expert on nothing. I could lecture on nothing. I could rabbit on for ages without actually saying nothing or... going...

BUZZ

NP: Clement you challenged, yes.

CF: I’m sorry!

NP: No you let two hesitations go...

WR: Thank you!

NP: ... and came in on the third one, the full-stop. Forty seconds for you to tell us something about nothing starting now.

CF: It is desperately difficult to say anything about nothing, because you are deviating from the subject which should be entirely empty and meaningless. So I might as well tell the poem to the audience which is one that has little meaning as far as I am concerned...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: Hesitation.

NP: Yes indeed Wendy...

CF: I wanted her to have it.

NP: So you got your favourite subject back of nothing and there are 20 seconds left starting now.

WR: Nothing can be very important if you have a lot of things. Because when one has nothing...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of because.

NP: You did say because before, I’m sorry.

WR: Did I? Oh dear!

NP: Yes indeed you did, 13 seconds for you Derek on nothing starting now.

DN: When the carpet layer’s away, I would like to lie down and whisper sweet nothings into her glorious ear. That blonde hair floating down on the...

WHISTLE

WR: I’ve told you before Derek, when we’re playing this game, you leave my husband out of this!

NP: So Derek speaking as the whistle went, but he’s still in second place. Derek it’s your turn to begin, the subject is crook. Will you tell us something about that in Just A Minute starting now.

DN: By hook or by crook I’ll be last in this book is something one used to write in autograph albums. There is a valid reason for so doing because in fact the crook is one of the ways that the peasanty could go round towns and villages, and actually go from the trees and take away the lower branches, that with a billhook as well, and they could actually keep those and hoard them up...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Two actuallys.

NP: There was two actuallys.

DN: Absolutely right!

NP: Thirty-eight seconds for you on crook, Clement, starting now.

CF: Too many crooks spoil the both is...

BUZZ

NP: Alistair McGowan.

AM: I’ve never heard both before in my life! What was both!

WR: Telling a joke!

CF: If cooks can spoil the broth...

NP: No no we like to hear from you Alistair...

AM: That’s sweet, right.

NP: Clement you have 34 seconds on crook starting now.

CF: The reason why they do this is because they come in and steal the saucepan as well as the cooker. It is an appalling thing that...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: He is not now talking about crooks, he’s talking about cooks.

CF: Crooks who steal from the kitchen! To the inconvenience of cooks! You don’t know enough!

NP: The audience are on your side Clement so I give you the benefit of the doubt on this occasion. Twenty-four seconds, crook, starting now.

CF: The Pope carries one a lot. I’m not sure why but...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Because he represents the Good Shepherd!

NP: It’s not often that Clement actually ahs his education increased on Just A Minute! But isn’t that the reason?

CF: Of course!

NP: Of course, well that’s all right.

CF: There was no hesitation, there was no deviation...

NP: No that’s right, you get another point Clement, that’s all right...

CF: Right!

NP: You were interrupted and Derek was showing off as usual, we don’t mind, that’s what he comes here for!

DN: He said he didn’t know why and I was just telling him!

NP: Clement you have 19 seconds, crook, starting now.

CF: Although many people think it is to denote the fact that he is a good shepherd there are others who are not certain of this. The fact is that he... the Papal Enunciate...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard challenged.

WR: I think we’ve had more than one fact, haven’t we?

NP: No we’ve only had one.

WR: Beg your pardon Clement!

NP: Yes so Clement has another point and six seconds...

WR: I’m suitably humble.

NP: ...on crook starting now.

CF: The prisons of this country are absolutely full of crooks who pretend they are innocent for which reason they’re quite often...

WHISTLE

NP: So Clement got a number of points in that round including one for speaking as the whistle went and he’s leapt forward, overtaken Derek Nimmo and now he’s in a strong lead. Clement it’s your turn to begin as well, the sharks is the subject and you begin now.

CF: Sharks are...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard.

WR: He hesitated.

NP: No! Talk about keenness Wendy he had only half a second.

WR: Well half a second can be a long time on radio. But if you think it was not a hesitation, go on.

NP: Well Clement you have 59 and a half seconds on sharks starting now.

CF: Like fish and chip shops, everybody likes sharks but nobody much likes living next to them...

BUZZ

NP: Derel Nimmo.

DN: He liked it too much.

NP: He liked too much. Yes, 53 seconds for you Derek on sharks starting now.

DN: Sharks are rather nasty creatures, in my opinion actually. With a fearsome shape and they’re very voracious eaters with nasty teeth under their... jaw. And I don’t think...

BUZZ

NP: Alistair McGowan.

AM: Hesitation.

NP: Hesitation Alistair correct. Forty-four seconds for you to tell us about sharks starting now.

AM: I’ve always wondered why they never get a song in West Side Story because the Jets have their own song, but the Sharks don’t get their own song do they...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy.

WR: Too many songs.

AM: Oh!

NP: Two songs yes. Wendy, 37 seconds on sharks starting now.

WR: I’ve seen several documentaries on sharks. I think they’re fascinating creatures. They have the most amazing teeth because they grow in rows and as one falls out it sirt of moves forward like a conveyor belt. Mind you, I wouldn’t like to go swimming in seas where there are sharks. Apparently some time ago when I was in Hawaii I was in the waters there, not realising that sharks were all over the place in the bay. You know when you see it on the telly and there’s that um, that chap...

WHISTLE

NP: So Wendy kept going until the whistle went so she was actually driven by those sharks there. Alistair it’s your turn to begin and the subject is models. Can you tell us something about models in Just A Minute starting now.

AM: As a boy I remember friends of mine at school were fascinated by little pieces of wood and plastic which they would stick together with glue and other such appendages. And I’d always wonder how they could be so obsessed with these strange shapes. Football was my thing, you see. That was what I wanted to do. That was what I... wanted....

BUZZ

AM... to do, to talk about a lot and repeat myself.

NP: Yeah, Derek you have got in there.

DN: Two I wanted.

NP: Forty seconds on models starting now.

DN: Jean Shrimpton comes to mind. I remember her at the Melbourne Cup when she actually had a skirt above the knee. And this caused tremendous outrage in Australia because it was the very first time they had seen a miniskirt. Afterwards they all wore them, they still do and they call them pussypelmets. It’s very interesting too that Barbara Gelman who during my youth was probably the most leading and outstanding model in Great Britain. Nowadays Jerry Hall I suppose is the person that we would look to, and certainly (starts to giggle) Mick Jagger occasionally has a glance at her...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Hesitation.

NP: Yeah, what a pity you didn’t let him go on, it was such delightful rubbish! There are 10 seconds for you, models starting now.

CF: Models is an anagram of seldom which is about right because I hardly ever encounter them these days. They wear clothes and walk along catwalks...

WHISTLE

NP: So Clement Freud was then again speaking as the whistle went, gained that extra point and has increased his lead at the end of the round. Wendy your turn to begin, the subject, credit. Will you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

WR: (takes huge breath) I always...

BUZZ

NP: Derek.

DN: (takes huger breath) A very long hesitation.

WR: I won’t... Listen! I’ve had this with you before Derek! I have to draw breath before I can speak!

DN: Well it’s called a hesitation when you do that.

NP: Well actually...

WR: Well how come it’s called hesitation when I do it and not when you do it then?

NP: No it was a very long... often Derek begins before I say now.

WR: All right, fair enough, I didn’t want to stress about it anyway.

NP: No, just... Wendy...

WR: It’s all right.

NP: I’m going to be perfectly fair and give you the benefit of the doubt because I thought it was actually hesitation. But you have 58 seconds...

WR: I don’t want to talk about it now! I’ve lost my train of thought, thanks to Derek, because he, he can...

NP: You got a point for being interrupted.

WR: Well all right, I’ll have the point and he can get on with it then!

NP: If that’s how you want to play it. You have the point, Derek gets on with it, credit is with you Derek, 58 seconds starting now.

DN: I’d like to give credit where it is due. And that is the credit that I would give and present to this...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Repetition of give.

NP: Fifty-three seconds for you on credit Clement starting now.

CF: Credit is an anagram of direct. Exactly what I shall talk about. Credit where credit is due is the sort of saying which I’ve always found totally meaningless. But... you...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy challenged.

WR: Hesitation.

NP: Hesitation is correct Wendy, you have another point, you have...

WR: Now you see that was a hesitation. That wasn’t drawing in breath!

NP: Well that’s all right, you don’t need to lecture me about it, I agree.

WR: No, I was making my point!

NP: Thirty-eight seconds left starting now.

WR: I often do not get the credit that is due to me. I feel very bitter about this at times. But I must not let such things get me down. Credit can go against you at times, you know. You never know really what your credit rating is. And it is important to realise what one’s standing is with credit. Because you might be able to... Clement Freud is not giving me credit for knowing he’s telling them not to buzz me. He wants me to go on for the full 60 seconds! You see what I mean about not getting credit when it’s due to you. I think it’s most ungentlemanly. I bet Nicholas has told Jane to leave that stopwatch alone as well! I know! I’m not, I’m not the dumb blonde they think I am! Anyway! Getting back to credit. I pay my credit cards off every month. I think it is most important not to let them get any interest on your hard-earned money...

NP: Blow the whistle.

WHISTLE

WR: I shall remember that Nicholas!

CF: I thought that was an unwarranted attack on the Chancellor of the Exchequer!

NP: Wendy Richard not only kept going until the whistle went so she gets a point for that. She gets another point for keeping going after, because I let the whistle go an extra 15 seconds. You got a lot of points in that round with the help of the chairman and er...

WR: He’s so modest is our Nicholas! Isn’t he!

NP: And you’re 10 points behind Clement Freud who’s still in the lead. Clement it’s your turn to begin, the subject is anagrams. Will you tell us something about that subject in this game starting now.

CF: I don’t really know a lot about anagrams. But if you do a crossword and find an anagram, the most sensible way to go about it is to put all the vowels in the top line and the consonants below. And that means that you can juggle with the letters on your piece of paper and quite frequently arrive at the correct answer. Anagram was the name of an exceddingly useful four-year-old hurdler who won the trial stakes at Chepstowe on New Years Day in nineteen hundred and seventy-one. I remember the case because I backed the thing to win at eight to one...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Win twice.

NP: No he had won the first time, yes. Clement has another point, 24 seconds on anagrams Clement starting now.

CF: Anagram is an anagram of margaan which is pretty important if you’re into that sort of thing. I’m rather tired of speaking about anagrams because I seem to have done nothing else...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard...

WR: I think he’s hesitating.

NP: I think he almost was Wendy. So you have 10 seconds to tell us something about anagrams starting now.

WR: Every day I try to do the crossword in the Telegraph. I’m not very good at anagrams so I have to have help. It would be my ambition, actually I nearly finished it today...

WHISTLE

NP: Well Clement Freud has increased his lead at the end of that round. And Wendy Richard is catching him up. And Alistair McGowan, your turn to begin, the subject great painters. Will you tell us something about those in Just A Minute starting now.

AM: The person who just recently painted the front of my house was one of the best painters I’ve known in my life. He started with the bottom and took off all the existing paintwork that was on the er afore-mentioned sill, and then sanded it down, used a blowtorch...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Hesitation er.

NP: Only just!

DN: Oh all right, only just! I’ll scrub it then!

AM: And he’s trailing badly!

NP: I know but I think what we might do on this occasion as Alistair’s never played the game before, we’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. And 48 seconds for you to continue Alistair on great painters starting now.

AM: His name was Roger and he really was quite superb. I’d recommend him to anybody. He’s in the yellow pages and lives somewhere near Wandsworth. If you do however have any doors...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard.

WR: Hesitation.

NP: Yeah there was another hesitation.

AM: Can’t get out of that time, no.

NP: Wendy you tell us something now about great painters with 39 seconds left starting now.

WR: We had a great painter do our house when we moved in. Our sitting room was a lovely bright sunshiney yellow and up the stairs and the halls are a lovely sort of pink...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo.

WR: And I said lovely twice.

DN: Repetition of two lovelies.

NP: There were two lovelies yes, it was all too lovely I’m afraid Wendy.

WR: It is.

NP: Twenty-eight seconds for you on great painters Derek starting now.

DN: The Swaggath exhibition at the Tate, I think, gives you a wonderful idea of some of the great painters, not only of this century, but going back to Van Dyck and so on. And I do recommend anyone who has a few moments to spare to pop along to that gallery and witness some of the great painters of the last four centuries. Not only is Hobsbawm...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy Richard....

WR: We’ve had centuries twice, haven’t we?

NP: Yes you had a century before, well listened. Six seconds for you on great painters...

DN: One was centuries and one was century.

WR: What’s a hundred years between friends Derek?

NP: Six seconds for you Wendy on great painters starting now.

WR: I’ll have to call back our great painter to do the outside of the place where we live. I want...

WHISTLE

NP: Wendy it’s your turn to begin and I hope the men get this subject after you. It’s called having my hair done. Sixty seconds to go starting now.

WR: Actually I don’t like having my hair done! I hate it! They mess about! They pull your hair and it gives me a cracking headache! I actually had my hair done today and I was in the hairdressers much longer than I anticipated, because Maurice, who does my hair beautifully put on this tint and it started to go a funny, my hair nearly went blue today! So I was...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of today.

NP: You said today...

WR: Oh did I?

NP: Yes, early on. So Derek will you tell us something about having my hair done.

DN: Actually I enjoy having my hair done greatly. I go to Trumpers which is in German Street and it’s terribly soothing the way they sort of ruffle your hair and then cut it and wash it. Perhaps you might have at the same time have a manicure which is particularly...

BUZZ

NP: Alistair McGowan challenged.

AM: Hesitation in there?

NP: I think so yes, it all sort of lolllolom. And so there’s 23 seconds for you Alistair to tell us about having my hair done starting now.

AM: I’ve always hated having my hair done or cut or anything ever since I was a young child. A boy at school called Craig Jones would always come up to me after having had the cut and he’s run his fingers through the back of the hair...

BUZZ

WR: We had two cuts.

NP: You had two cuts, yes. You were going very fast but she did pick it up.

AM: Good story.

NP: So Wendy, 14 seconds on having my hair done starting now.

WR: Quite often when I go home after having had my hair done, my husband never notices I’ve had my hair done. I find this very frustrating. He had his hair done on Saturday and I told him how nice it looked. But today...

WHISTLE

NP: So I think we’re moving into the last round. Wendy Richard got a number of points in that round with her hair. She’s in second place only just behind Clement Freud, then comes Derek Nimmo and then Alistair McGowan. And Derek will you take this round and the subject is video cameras. Will you tell us something about video cameras in Just A Minute starting now.

DN: I got my first video camera from a man called Mr Barkier. He gave it to me as a present as a matter of fact. I was sitting beside the same swimming pool that I was sunbathing at the other day in Dubai about four years ago and he sent an emissary to me called Mr Singh. And he said (in Indian accent) "I would like very much to give you a video camera". (normal voice) And I was so moved. I thought it was quite the most extraordinary generous thing that ever happened to me. And so I went back to visit the afore-mentioned Indian gentleman at his house there...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Two gentlemen.

NP: So 30 seconds are left Clement and you have video cameras starting now.

CF: I always thought I’d be rather a good photographer but I’ve never had a camera. It’s very difficult to work out whether in fact this would be a boaster. Video cameras are the sort of things like children give each other. But I’m not sure whether they are different video cameras or always the same one being passed from son to daughter. You can...

BUZZ

NP: Alistair McGowan challenged.

AM: Hesitation.

NP: Yes I agree Alistair. You’ve got nine seconds to tell us something about video cameras Alistair starting now.

AM: What bemuses me about people who possess these video cameras...

BUZZ

NP: Clement Freud challenged.

CF: Deviation, he suddenly started speaking slowly.

AM: I’ve got nine seconds, I was trying to spin it out!

NP: He’s actually gaining confidence. We’ll have to have you back when you speak slowly all the time Alistair. That wasn’t a correct challenge so you ahve another point for that Alistair. Six seconds on video cameras starting now.

AM: I am bemused by people who point these cameras at things...

BUZZ

WR: He just said bemused the time before.

AM: But I was interrupted wasn’t I.

NP: But you were amused before.

WR: Yes I know, but you’re not supposed to say it again because they’ve had me on that one.

NP: Yeah. But the thing is Alistair you’ve never played the game before and you didn’t know that, did you.

AM: No I didn’t no, the benefit of the doubt I think Nicholas, I think that’s what we’re looking at here!

WR: Dear me!

AM: But I won’t do it again.

NP: If you’ve used the word before and you are interrupted, you mustn’t use it again. So you have four seconds to continue on video cameras...

WR: Just a minute, don’t I get a point? Because it was a correct challenge actually!

NP: All right, we’ll give Wendy a point for a correct challenge. And Alistair a point for being interrupted. And he keeps the subject, four seconds on video cameras starting now.

AM: They direct these things at... items that...

BUZZ

WR: Hesitation.

NP: Yes it was hesitation, you get a point for a correct challenge, but Alistair’s going to finish the show for us, all right? And you get a... and you get another point actually because you didn’t know that you couldn’t hesitate in that particular way. And there’s only one second left and don’t hesitate again if you can help it. Video cameras starting now.

AM: Why direct them at things that don’t actually move?

WHISTLE

NP: So Alistair McGowan with extreme skill at playing the game kept going until the whistle went and gained that extra point for doing so. And he still finished up in fourth place. Derek finished in third place, and then Wendy Richard with lots of points didn’t quite overtake our leader. She finished two points behind Clement Freud who is our winner this week. We do hope that you have enjoyed this edition of Just A Minute and will want to tune in again at the same time this week. Until then it only remains for me to say on behalf of our four excellent panellists and also Jane Stevens who’s been sitting beside me blowing the whistle and keeping the score for me. Also our producer Sarah Smith and the creator of the game, Ian Messiter and myself Nicholas Parsons. From all of us until the next time, bye-bye!

THEME MUSIC