JAM:PMerton,DNimmo,PJones,RMurdoch
WELCOME TO JUST A MINUTE!

starring PAUL MERTON, DEREK NIMMO, PETER JONES and RICHARD MURDOCH, chaired by NICHOLAS PARSONS (Radio, 4 April 1989)

NOTE: Paul Merton's first appearance.


NICHOLAS PARSONS: Welcome to Just A Minute.

THEME MUSIC

NP: Hello my name is Nicholas Parsons. And as the Minute Waltz fades away once more, it is my pleasure to introduce to you the four exciting and dynamic personalities who this week are going to play Just A Minute. We welcome back Paul Merton and Richard Murdoch. And we welcome back who have been playing the game for quite a long time, Peter Jones and Derek Nimmo. Will you please welcome all four of them! Beside me sits Ian Messiter the creator of the game who not only blows his whistle when 60 seconds are up, but also keeps the score for us. And what Iím going to do is ask our four panelists as usual if they can speak on the subject I give them and they will try and do that without hesitation, repetition or deviation. And we will begin the show this week with Derek Nimmo. Derek the subject is coconut shies. Will you tell us something about that subject in this game starting now.

DEREK NIMMO: Iíve always liked going to the fairground and taking part in a coconut shy, or rather shying at coconuts. The first one I ever went to was at Blackpool and then at New Brighton on the Wirral Peninsula. I do think it is the most exciting game. And when you see the chap standing there saying (singing) "Iíve got a lovely bunch of coconuts. I possess a pair of beautiful... balls. There stands my wife, the idol of my life singing Ďroll a spherical object, roll one like thatí". Itís a very nice game to play, and you have marvelous prizes of course too...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones.

DN: Wonderful prizes! They have...

PETER JONES: He repeated the word game, he repeated game.

DN: Did he?

NP: Yes he did.

PJ: He definitely did. Game at the beginning.

NP: He tried to shout you down Peter, so you couldnít even get your challenge in.

PJ: I know he did.

NP: Itís difficult sitting beside him, isnít it. That was a correct challenge, you get a point for that and you have 24 seconds to talk on the subject of coconut shies starting now.

PJ: My experience was when I was a boy, was that the coconuts were always very heavy and the ball was very light. But I was very keen indeed...

BUZZ

NP: And Richard Murdoch has challenged.

RICHARD MURDOCH: Itís another very.

NP: Richard youíve got in with a correct challenge and a point for you, and 16 seconds for you to take over the subject of coconut shies starting now.

RM: I first found a coconut shy at Blakeney in Norfolk during the... gaso...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Hesitation Iím afraid.

RM: Yes!

NP: Hesitationís correct so you get a point for a correct challenge, 10 seconds, coconut shies starting now.

DN: Quite the nicest coconut shies that I ever came across was when I drove from Melbourne on the long road to Geelong. And when I got there I found this fairground par excellence...

BUZZ

NP: And Paul Merton has challenged.

PAUL MERTON: Repetition of fairground.

NP: Right, you talked about the fairground before.

DN: Very, very well listened! Yes!

NP: So not only that, we have heard from everybody in the first round, isnít that exciting! And it is half a second to go, so youíve got in marvellously just before the end Paul, coconut shies starting now.

PM: Coconut!

WHISTLE

NP: For those of our audience who may know, but Paul actually had a very funny look on his face then. But actually itís a great advantage to get in just before the whistle because it means that you keep going and when the whistle goes whoeverís speaking then gets an extra point. And it was Paul Merton whoís in the lead at the end of that round. And weíd like him to take the next round Paul, the subject clout. Can you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

PM: Well I suppose clout means power, the exercise of energy making somebody doing something, perhaps they wouldnít want to do. Clout is er making for example...

BUZZ

NP: And Derek Nimmo has challenged.

DN: Hesitation, is er.

NP: And there are 49 seconds for you to take over the subject of clout starting now.

DN: I think a particularly useful English proverb is that one which says neíer cast a clout when May is out. Because we do seem to have increasingly long winters and the spring seems eternal. And therefore a clout should not be got, forgotten...

BUZZ

NP: And Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Hesitation.

NP: Hesitation is right Peter, 32 seconds are left, and you now tell us something about clout starting now.

PJ: I suppose it is power, as Paul said. And absolute power or clout...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of power.

NP: Thereís too much power.

PJ: Oh so there was, yes.

NP: Twenty-six seconds are left and itís you Derek, again on clout starting now.

DN: I suppose few people in the southern hemisphere have more clout than the former Mayor of Auckland, Dove-Myer Robinson. What a remarkable man! Robbie to his chums! He was a great power lord in that city for so many years...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton has challenged.

PM: I think this is deviation, I mean there surely must be more people in the southern hemisphere with more clout, you know, with more clout than...

DN: I said few, few!

PM: But Iíve never heard of him, I mean...

DN: Very many people in Auckland have heard of Dove-Myer Robinson.

NP: It was a very good try at deviation. But actually he did say few people. He did sort of preface it with that. So I think to try and be fair Derek should keep the subject and still go on telling us about clout starting now.

DN: (in Northern accent) So if you donít shut up, Iíll give you a clout around the ears. (normal voice) Thatís what my mother used to say to me when I was little, living in Bradford. And I remember being frightened of getting clouts when I came in from school. It was the most...

WHISTLE

NP: Ah Derek Nimmo got a number of points in that round, including one for speaking as the whistle went. And therefore he has leapt into the lead at the end of the round. Richard Murdoch will you take the next round. The subject is the ideal garden. Will you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

RM: Well the ideal garden has fairies at the bottom of it. You just keep red haired and keep past the garden shed. It also has a little wood with moss in it and beetles and a little stream that quietly runs through. You wouldnít think theyíd dare to go merry-making there, but they do! And another thing that you have to have in this garden is three dimensions, sight, sound and scent. The sound I...

BUZZ

RM: Yes!

NP: So itís so difficult, isnít it. But he kept going for...

RM: Too many sounds yes!

NP: ...29 seconds, yes and Derek challenged first...

DN: Two littles, two sounds.

NP: Yes, repetition there, 31 seconds the ideal garden with you Derek starting now.

DN: To me the actual best and ideal garden I ever saw was Liberaceís garden in... Leberley Hills in ...

BUZZ

DN: Itís its brother! Itís near! Itís the flat part of Beverley Hills, Levelly Hills you see!

PM: I do believe this was when his career wasnít doing too well!

NP: so deviation there, right Paul youíre in first, the ideal gardenís with you and you have 24 seconds starting now.

PM: Of course some people say that the ideal garden is the garden of Eden where Adam and Eve would stroll around without any clothes on, until Eve one day said to...

BUZZ

PM: Ah!

NP: Oh it was getting very exciting and um... it had me going there Paul but Derek got in, 15 seconds for you Derek, what was your challenge, just...

DN: Repetition...

NP: Yes.

DN: Too much of Eve with nothing on!

NP: Yes. So you have 15 seconds on the ideal garden starting now.

DN: Lee showed me his lawn which was actually made of plastic grass. And it was a very good idea because instead of having to mow it, he used to hoover it every day. And I thought to me this would be the ideal garden to have because...

WHISTLE

NP: Ideal for Liberace but I donít think the ideal garden. Derek you kept going till the whistle went, gained that extra point, you have increased your lead at the end of the round and itís Peter Jonesí turn to begin. Peter the subject weíve got here is a useful thingamabob. Itís an unusual subject but youíre an unusual personality so can you talk in an unusual way for 60 seconds if you can starting now.

PJ: A useful thingamabob or doodah is a sort of whatchermacallit and was invented by um whatshisname...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Murdoch challenged.

RM: There was a slight hesitation, he had an er in there which I donít think he...

NP: With all those, with all those words he was getting Iím not surprised. So yes but Richard you were correct, it was repetition and you have 50 seconds for...

PJ: Repetition of what?

NP: Sorry hesitation, hesitation.

RM: Hesitation.

NP: Iíve only been doing this for 22 years, Iím not quite sure of the rules yet.

PJ: I know, I know. Another year or two and youíll be getting into it!

DN: Another year or two, theyíll put him down!

NP: Would every member of the audience who applauded that remark of er... kindly be ejected um... Richard yes, hesitation. Er. A useful thingamabob is the subject, there are 50 seconds left er Richard starting now.

RM: A thingamabob is also called a whatchermacallit or a whatsit. It can be a sort of a mixture of it all such as a...

BUZZ

RM: Oh! I couldnít think what it was a mixture of.

NP: Derek got in there.

DN: Hesitation, he sort of stopped didnít he.

NP: Yes.

RM: Yes.

NP: He was searching as, as...

RM: Oh yes!

NP: ...Peter was earlier. Forty-one seconds are left, weíre going to hear from you on a useless thingamabob.

DN: Actually a useful thingamabob is rather like a useful thingamajig. And actually I have one, now I think of it, in my pocket here. This is not the sort of thing that youíve always seen me for and you mightnít necessarily know what it was. So you would call it a thingamabob because the actual word escapes you. That is why this particular phrase...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Murdoch challenged.

RM: Thatís another particular.

NP: And you have 21 seconds to tell us something now about a useful thingamabob starting now.

RM: The word I was trying to think of was Gallimorfree. Thereís also Ollipordreda which means roughly the same thing as a thingamabob. Or a whatchermacall it...

BUZZ

RM: ...which I have already mentioned and for which I... thoroughly deserve...

NP: Paul Merton spotted it first, so Paul you are having him for repetition there and you have eight seconds to tell us about a useful thingamabob starting now.

PM: Another word for thingamybob is unogangdunctwada or in other words a yemadimadongbadoywoya...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of doga.

NP: I must confirm you did actually say doga twice. So thereís half a second left on a useful thingamabob with you Derek starting now.

DN: A useful thingamabob!

WHISTLE

NP: Oh Derek Nimmoís getting a lot of points in this game and he got a number of points in that round including one for speaking as the whistle went. Has increased his lead. Let me just tell you that in second place equal are Richard Murdoch and Paul Merton, followed by Peter Jones. And Derek Nimmoís turn to begin and the subject now is Dracula. We certainly get around the world in this, Dracula, thingamybob. But thereís 60 seconds as always Derek starting now.

DN: Nicholas youíre very observant. If weíre going to talk about Count Dracula, weíll have to go to Transylvania where he lived in this vast castle. And the unfortunate thing, he was bitten quite early in life by a vampire. Now theyíre believed to be the souls of heretics that took a bat form and then flew into peopleís windows and with their sharp teeth drew the blood. And so it happened to Dracula and he himself became one of these aforementioned dreaded creatures. And the only way to get rid of Dracula was to drive a stake into his heart to keep away. You could use garlic but it didnít always work. Or the prayer book. And sometimes rosary beads. But this thing that our loyal Lord died upon, the thing which you must shove into Dracula if you are going to get him! And thatís what we want...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Murdoch.

DN: I was just getting going then!

RM: He had a stake driven into his heart and then the word came in again.

NP: Driven in?

RM: Yes.

NP: Yes thatís right, yes, yes. You were all listening to see if he was going to use the word heart and he didnít, but you got him on the driven. So well done Richard, youíve got six seconds to tell us something about Dracula starting now.

RM: Itís not generally known that the word Dracula spelt backwards is alucard. And...

WHISTLE

NP: Well that interesting thought kept you going until the whistle Richard, gave you an extra point. And youíre now clear in second place ahead of Paul Merton and Peter Jones is following behind Paul, but out in the lead is Derek Nimmo. And Paul Mertonís turn to begin, Paul the subject bottle.

PM: Well again, this is one of these words which means something else. Bottle can refer to courage or nerve. For example a parachutist who refuses to jump out of a plane er maybe because heís...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Sadly a hesitation.

NP: No!

DN: Er!

NP: I disagree entirely!

DN: Oh!

NP: What do you mean "oh" in the audience?

DN: Well he said er, didnít he!

NP: I donít think he hesitated, no. I think you should keep going about the parachutist.

DN: All right.

NP: Forty-nine seconds, we want to hear from you Paul...

RM: To err is human!

NP: An incorrect challenge, on bottle starting now.

PM: If he was to jump out er without a parachute, he could be said...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Did he do it again then? Or am I mishearing him?

NP: What, what are you challenging for?

DN: He keeps syaing er, doesnít he? Or am I...

NP: He didnít say er. He actually repeated parachute but you didnít challenge him for that. So Paul you keep going with 44 seconds on bottle starting now.

PM: I had a friend called Ernie and we all called him Er! He was so...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Not hesitation, repetition of er!

PM: But hadnít we, hadnít we ruled that I hadnít said er before?

PJ: Iíd like to hear what happened to the man who was about to jump out of the plane!

NP: I think we all...

PM: He doesnít come round much any more!

NP: So Paul youíre going to continue with 39 seconds on bottle starting now.

PM: Fifteen thousand feet he plummeted towards the earth. His ears were held back by the wind as he attempted to fly back up to the plane. But it was to no avail because he traveled down to terra firma at such a rate that he was splattered out as flat as a pancake by the time he hit the ground! And his wife later described his condition as very satisfactory! Now...

BUZZ

DN: Whatís this got to do with bottle? Deviation!

PJ: Well you have to have bottle to tell a story like that!

NP: Peter you took the very words out of my mouth...

PJ: Oh Iím very sorry.

NP: But you say it so much better than I do! I think you answered for me so Paul gets another point for an incorrect challenge and he continues with 12 seconds on bottle starting now.

PM: Another example of bottle was perhaps the gladiators who would have to go into the ring to fight various lions. Now these animals would be lined up outside the er...

BUZZ

NP: Richard yeah what was your challenge Richard?

RM: Ah you er ah he erred.

NP: A definite hesitation Richard and you got in with half a second on bottle starting now.

RM: I...

WHISTLE

NP: So Paul Merton got a number of points in that round and Richard Murdoch also got one for speaking, he got two actually, an extra one for speaking as the whistle went. And theyíre now together equal in second place only a few points behind our leader who is still Derek Nimmo. And Richard your turn to begin. Silly songs, will you tell us something about them starting now.

RM: One hears a lot of silly songs on the wireless. Mostly the songs written nowadays are rather stupid. In fact you canít hear the words so you donít quite know how silly they are. I have written and spun, sung some silly songs...

BUZZ

RM: Spun, sung!

NP: Peter Jones challenged.

PJ: Sort of deviation, he was talking about spinning!

RM: Yes!

PJ: As well as singing.

RM: Spinning songs.

NP: It doesnít matter, he was still on silly songs whether he was spinning or singing. So Richard you have another point and 42 seconds on silly songs starting now.

RM: A silly song might be (sings) donít eat peas with a very short breadknife
If itís inadvisable
Just use a sizeable
Thing like a ladle or a fork instead.
Donít push... oh yes...

BUZZ

RM: I know what for because I did it...

NP: Peter challenged again.

PJ: Well deviation, repetition and hesitation!

RM: Yes! I, I... guilty of all three!

NP: Yes but I can only give you one point Iím afraid Peter...

PJ: Oh really?

NP: Yes...

PJ: Ah pity!

NP: As youíre so popular, Iíll give you three points. There you are! And um... you have 31 seconds to ctach up and talk on silly songs starting now.

PJ: When there was er a boy er...

BUZZ

NP: Iím sorry, I think I completely inhibited you by my remark about giving you three points.

PJ: Oh it was crushing! Crushing it was!

NP: I think it was extremely unfair of me, I donít like to be unfair as chairman of Just A Minute, so I will not allow Derekís challenge and tell you to keep going for 30 seconds with silly songs starting now.

PJ: It was called You Canít Do That There ĎEre! And anywhere else you can actually perform this act, but not in the present position that youíre in. That was the er paraphrase of the song...

BUZZ

NP: Youíve been...

PJ: ...which was really a silly... what?

NP: Youíve been challenged...

PJ: Ah! Who is challenging?

NP: Richard challenged first.

RM: Yes, yes, that was very very... a big hesitation!

NP: A big hesitation, he definitely said er and Richard youíve got the subject, silly songs back, with 18 seconds to go starting now.

RM: I...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo.

DN: Well nothing happened at all! Hesitation!

PJ: I know...

NP: Hesitation yes...

PJ: It wasnít long enough though to be a hesitation!

NP: Derek got in first and he has 16 seconds on silly songs starting now.

DN: One of the silly songs that I used to enjoy in my youth which of course was a very long time ago, is Maressss-eat oats and does devour cereals..

BUZZ

NP: Richard Murdoch challenged.

RM: Itís Mares not Mars!

NP: That song? Itís not Mars, itís not either the thing you eat or your mother.

DN: I... I said mares eat oats. (sings very quickly) Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy, a littlie divey-doo, wouldnít you?

PJ: Weíll let you know!

NP: Yes... no I, I, I donít think you got the job um Derek and so Richard has the job which is to continue talking on silly songs with six seconds to go starting now.

RM: Well I remember mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy, kiddlie tivey too, clause....

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Repetition of eat.

NP: Derek you got in with one second to go on silly songs starting now.

DN: My Uncle Gerryís got a very big belly...

WHISTLE

NP: So a lot of points were scored with silly songs and the situation now is that Derek Nimmoís still in the lead but only two points ahead of Richard Murdoch whoís four points ahead of Paul Merton. And itís Peterís turn to begin. Peter the word is rag, again one of those subjects you can take in many different ways. Let us hear how youíre going to take it in Just A Minute as you begin now.

PJ: Itís the kind of entertainment that medical and university students mount to collect er...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Sorry a little hesitation.

PJ: Yeah I did.

NP: Yes well you neednít apologise for it.

DN: You have to apologise or otherwise youíll give him three points!

NP: Iíve only done that once in 22 years so youíve got to be a little different occasionally. Fifty-three seconds for you Derek on rag starting now.

DN: One of the better known pubs in Pall Mall of course is the Army and Navy Club which is frequented by distinguished officers of those said forces. And that is known...

BUZZ

DN: ...as the Rag...

NP: And Paul Merton challenged.

PM: Oh he just came to what it has to do with rag.

NP: I think you were just in time Paul because I think he began...

DN: Everybody knows that the Army and Navy Club is called the Rag!

NP: Letís ask this audience, does everybody in this audience know that the Army and Navy Club is called the Rag?

PJ: They do now!

NP: You see, they, none of them knew. There we are. You knew but it was not established sufficiently quickly so it is deviation Derek. Youíve got to establish these facts very rapidly. Paul you have the subject, 43 seconds, rag, starting now.

PM: A rag is a useful household object. You can use a rag to wipe down the windows or clean the table, or perhaps to polish the television screen. Rag is also a very popular name for a pony and many is the young girl whoís woken up at Christmas time to find a small horse in a stocking and thought this is marvellous, I can go...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: You canít get a horse into a stocking! I mean...

PM: Can I emphasise...

PJ: Deviation! Deviation!

PM: Can I emphasise that this is a very small horse!

RM: Itís a very big stocking!

PM: Yes!

NP: It could have been a tpy horse as well, couldnít it? So therefore he was not deviating and Paul you have 20 seconds to continue on rag starting now.

PM: Rag was the name that I gave to my batman in the Army though I was in the Navy as well. As you know thatís known as the Rag, doing the rag. I...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Hesitation.

NP: Yes I think he did er on that occasion Peter, so you have hesitation on the subject of rag and 11 seconds starting now.

PJ: Well thatís really more than I need! However (starts to laugh)

BUZZ

NP: Oh! Paul Merton helped you out by challenging first...

PJ: Oh he did yes!

PM: I want...

NP: We give Peter Jones a bonus point because we enjoyed his remark and Paul Merton a point because he got a correct challenge and heís also got the subject of rag and seven seconds starting now.

PM: Rag is one of those words that you spell it backwards, it spells gar G-A-R...

WHISTLE

NP: So Paul was speaking then when the whistle went, gained that extra point. Heís still in third... no, heís not, heís equal in second place now alongside Richard Murdoch. Theyíre still trailing our leader Derek Nimmo by three points and not far behind them is Peter Jones. But Derek itís your turn to begin, the subject is my bicycle. Will you tell us something about that in this game starting now.

DN: Yes my bicycle has two wheels...

BUZZ

NP: Paul Merton.

PM: Thereís a surprise! So the seven wheeler Iíve got is out of fashion, is it?

NP: Yes! Actually I was..

PM: I challenge for unnecessary information!

NP: I thought the... knowing Derekís age I was surprised it wasnít three wheels!

PM: If we go a little bit further we might find out itís got a saddle as well!

DN: It helps to describe these things very carefully!

PM: Iím trying to imagine it in my mind, you know!

NP: Itís one of those occasions when I like to give a bonus point to Paul because we enjoyed the challenge but he actually, Derek wasnít deviating in any way so he does keep the subject and gets a point for an incorrect challenge, my bicycle, 57 seconds left Derek starting now.

DN: It has indeed a leather saddle, cross across. And then we have a bell and a gear change. And manyís the happy day when Iíve taken it to New Zealand and driven it down to Dunedin to see Shona McFarlane who used to be married to the Minister of Arts. And he greatly admired my bicycle. And Iíd give him a little trip sitting on the back. And he thought it was so exciting! And then weíd go scurrying further down to Invercargill to eat the Stewart Island oysters from the back of my bicycle. I now keep it in Northamptonshire...

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Deviation.

NP: Why?

PJ: Eating the oysters from the back of his bicycle? What does he mean?

NP: I think it would be almost impossible to eat oysters...

PJ: Yes youíd never get them open, would you? I donít think...

NP: He had, he had this Minister of the Arts with him on the back of the bicycle anyway.

PJ: Well yes quite...

NP: Where the oysters were...

DN: Iíd got rid of him by now, I went down to Invercargill to get the oysters. You donít listen, you see!

NP: I was listening...

DN: Stewart Island oysters come from Invercargill and not Dunedin.

PJ: Derek likes to bring in the name Invercargill...

DN: Have you no...

PJ: ...because he had a big success, I think his last, in Invercargill! And naturally he wants to publicise it!

NP: Well Iíll tell you the situation. There are 20 seconds to go, weíre in the last round, Derekís still in the lead. I donít think he can be assailed and Peter you certainly canít overtake him. So weíll give you the point and tell you to tell us something about my bicycle starting now.

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Hesitation, he didnít say anything.

NP: Yes but as Peter...

DN: Well he didnít say anything. Somebody didnít say anything so I must have won! Nobody said anything and I challenged! Either I didnít say something or he didnít say...

NP: Youíre going to win the game anyway Derek...

DN: I challenged!

NP: So shut up!

PJ: You should never say that! We all lose heart if you say er...

NP: Very...

PJ: I give up altogether! I may as well go home, you know!

NP: But as I say it doesnít matter who wins the game, itís the contribution that you make. And your contribution is enjoyed and appreciated and loved isnít it, ladies and gentlemen? There are 20, no actually there are only 19 seconds left now, the end of this game, this round and also this game and weíre going to hear from you Peter on my bicycle, so we want to hear from you.

PJ: My first bicycle was a Norton, made by the people who made the motorcycle...

BUZZ

NP: Derek Nimmo challenged.

DN: Made it twice.

NP: It was made twice yes.

PJ: Was it? Oh dear oh dear! Still you got the meaning of it, didnít you?

NP: So Derekís got another point and heís got the subject back of my bicycle starting now.

DN: My bicycleís not a Norton, itís a Raleigh and named after that distinguished...

BUZZ

NP: Richard Murdoch challenged.

RM: Thatís not an ordinary bicycle, thatís a motor bicycle.

DN: A Raleigh?

RM: And weíre talking about a bicycle.

DN: A Raleighís not a motorcycle.

NP: Which one is not a...

RM: Well a...

NP: Which one? Which one?

RM: Oh yes, I believe heís right, yes! Itís so long since I had one that I... I do apologise to you.

NP: It doesnít matter, it was great fun. Derek you have another point, because it was an incorrect challenge. Youíre further out in the lead. There are 11 seconds towards the end of this show and you go on on my bicycle starting now.

DN: I was singing to my wife sitting on my bicycle (sings) "Patty, Patricia, give me your example do, Iím half crazy all for the love of you. It wonít be a stylish marriage, I canít afford a carriage..."

BUZZ

NP: Peter Jones has challenged.

PJ: Itís better than mares eat oats! He is improving actually!

DN: But youíre still going to let me know, are you?

NP: Yes heís improving right, so weíll let you know. Another point to Peter because we enjoyed that challenge and thereís half a second for Derek to continue on my bicycle starting now.

DN: Bicycle clips...

WHISTLE

NP: So you realise from what I said a little while ago, we have no more time to play Just A Minute so I will give you the final situation. All of them, almost, three of them, were equal together, one point between the three of them which is very difficult to work out, Iím not going to be detailed on that. But they were all a number of points behind Derek Nimmo who never stopped talking throughout this particular show and therefore he not only deserves the order which we accord him this week of saying Derek you are the winner! We hope that you have enjoyed this edition of Just A Minute and if you do we hope that youíll want to tune in again next week when we take to the air. On behalf of our four superb panellists, Paul Merton, Richard Murdoch, Peter Jones and Derek Nimmo. Also the man who thought of the game Ian Messiter and our producer who sits behind us in a little glass bowl looking at us all, that is Edward Taylor, and myself, Nicholas Parsons, thank you for tuning in. From us all good-bye.

THEME MUSIC