JAM:WRichard,THawks,RNoble,SPerkins
WELCOME TO JUST A MINUTE!

starring WENDY RICHARD, TONY HAWKS, ROSS NOBLE and SUE PERKINS, chaired by NICHOLAS PARSONS (Radio, 4 March 2002)


NICHOLAS PARSONS: Welcome to Just A Minute!

THEME MUSIC

NP: Thank you, thank you, hello, my name is Nicholas Parsons. And as the Minute Waltz fades away once more it is my pleasure to welcome our many listeners, not only in this country but in all the other countries around the world who listen to us on the World Service. And we also welcome to the show this week four exciting, talented, intrepid and really experienced players of the game who have come together just for your joy and benefit. And in no order of seniority, let me introduce to you Wendy Richard, Sue Perkins, Ross Noble and Tony Hawks. Please welcome all four of them! Beside me sits Janet Staplehurst whoís going to help me keep the score, and sheíll blow a whistle when the 60...

WENDY RICHARD: Nicholas, can I just ask you something?

NP: Yes.

WR: Just then, you said...

SUE PERKINS: Seniority!

WR: Yes! Are you implying...

SP: Thank you! Tonyís older than me!

WR: Are you implying that Iím older than this lot?

NP: No...

WR: Because I take exception to that!

NP: No, I put you top of the bill, because in show biz seniority, I thought you were top of the bill.

WR: Right, as long as youíre not, as long as youíre not being ageist!

NP: All right, Iíll do it the other way round! Um but anyway, no, no, Wendy, because you are very experienced and very highly established, I thought it would be a nice courtesy...

WR: All right, thank you, thatís fine, lovely! Thank you!

ROSS NOBLE: Can I just ask why was I last?

SP: Why was I second?

NP: Because you are the highly talented new kid on the block, you see.

SP: So he gets to be young and virile? And I get to be second!

WR: But yeah I donít...

TONY HAWKS: Listen, if weíre quibbling over the introduction, weíll never get through the show!

NP: You can see that if you have four equally well-known and equally talented players of the game, there is no way that you can comfortably introduce them in sequence without somebody feeling a little bit upset. So let us get on, and somebody who doesnít get upset because sheís on her own here and that is Janet Staplehurst who will help me keep the score and blow her whistle when the 60 seconds are up. And this particular edition of Just A Minute is coming from this beautiful matchima theatre, the Kingís Theatre in the Southsea which is part of the great city of Portsmouth. And in front of us here we have a packed Hampshire audience coming from all parts of this delightful county of Hampshire to encourage us in our antics. And Ross the subject Iíve got in front of me is the best advice Iíve ever had. Will you talk on that subject in 60 seconds if you can starting now.

RN: The best advice Iíve ever had was from Mister Nicholas Parsons who gave me a strict lecture, about the best way to introduce people! It really was a magnificent piece of advice, I think...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: No, that was a mistake. Because he repeated, I thought, advice was repeated, but of course...

NP: Just to explain to our listeners, you can not only repeat the whole phrase, but you can repeat any words that are in that phrase. Ross you get a point for an incorrect challenge...

RN: Itís also a lie as well, Tony! You could have had that!

NP: I rather enjoyed what you said actually. But Ross there are 48 seconds still available, the best advice I ever had starting now.

RN: Iíve been given many pieces of advice. One is if youíre ever attacked by a bear, try not to look like a picnic basket! Itís a very difficult thing to do, but if you stand upright, you donít in anyway resemble that wicker device for holding the tasty treats...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Slight hesitation.

NP: There was a slight hesitation Sue. So you have a correct challenge, you get a point for that of course, and you have the best advice I ever had and there are 31 seconds available starting now.

SP: The best piece of advice I ever had also came from Nicholas Parsons, which was to go to this very particular theatre, this beautiful illustrious place, and see Bonnie Langford whoís doing a one night musical extravaganza, interpreting all forms of dance for your visual delight! Ah I couldnít believe it, youíll say to my family and friends. The pixie of pop was there in all her four foot glory. And we saw her pirouetting and dance magic was available to all of us for the princely sum of...

BUZZ

SP: I know I repeated dance.

NP: Ross.

RN: There was a rep, there was definitely a repetition of dance.

NP: There was indeed and so Ross, you have a correct challenge, a point for that, and you take the subject back, the best advice I ever had, five seconds still starting now.

RN: If youíre a fireman, donít go and try and rescue squirrels from trees. Thatís a piece of advice...

WHISTLE

NP: In this game whoever is speaking when the whistle goes gains an extra point. And it was Ross Noble who has most points at the end of that round, as you can imagine. In fact heís the only one who scored, apart from Sue Perkins. And Sue itís your turn to begin, the subject is pixie boots. Tell us something about pixie boots in Just A Minute starting now.

SP: Pixie boots were extremely fashionable in the mid 80s. I never subscribed to that particular moment. In fact I have to say that pixies usually come up at around about the five inches mark. And therefore their tiny hooven trotters are only about two centimetres. If you want to trap a pixie and then to get its boots...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: A pixie is three foot tall.

SP: Ah, not the Croydonian pixie!

TH: Theyíre not five inches...

SP: The inner London pixie is slightly more stunted!

NP: Well I think it depends on who is illustrating the particular story. I mean you could make a pixie any size you like. Thereís no, no traditional size...

TH: Well we need to get...

RN: If it were 12 foot, it would be a giant!

NP: And then Ross, they would probably call it a giant and not a pixie! but if it was only three inches tall...

RN: At what point is the pixie cut-off?

SP: I think the height restriction for a pixie, if itís above.. two foot. Shall we agree on that? Above two foot...

TH: Weíre in the EEC now, we need to have a European standard for pixies.

NP: Ah I donít know if there is a cut-off point, but letís assume that within the rules of Just A Minute she wasnít actually er deviating so I give her the benefit of the doubt, and I will find a way to redress it if I can later for you Tony. Forty-four seconds with you still Sue on pixie boots starting now.

SP: I went in search of the Brussels pixie who weighed in at around about three stone and...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: Repetition of three.

NP: Yes.

TH: It was me that said three.

NP: No, you said three inches, didnít you?

TH: No, she said five inches and I said theyíre three foot tall in my challenge.

NP: All right.

RN: Fair enough.

NP: Thank you for your honesty Tony, Sue you have another point, you have 38 seconds, pixie boots starting now.

SP: So you want to go down to the end of the garden and rig up some elaborate netting device. Then in the middle of the night when the moon shines down, the wee little people of the er particular...

BUZZ

SP: Oh right! Just trying to tell how you net a pixie!

NP: Tony, pixie boots, 30 seconds starting now.

TH: The best piece of advice I ever had was Nicholas Parsons who said ďwear some pixie boots in...Ē

BUZZ

NP: Ross Noble challenged.

RN: He went back in time there!

NP: Why?

RN: Well because he was doing the best piece of advice.

NP: I know, but he can still say that, he was allowing it to pixie boots.

RN: I was just hoping youíd give me the benefit of the doubt, I suppose.

WR: Nicholas wonít stop him, because he mentioned his name again!

SP: Yes!

WR: He loves it! He loves it! Thatís why he will not chastise you!

NP: Wendy you can be very acid on occasions! And very unwarranted! Right! Tony you have another er correct, incorrect challenge, you have another point, you have 26 seconds on pixie boots starting now.

TH: And I wore these pixie boots on the streets of Southsea on a Friday night, and my goodness, what...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy challenged.

WR: I think we were shuddering to... a hesitation.

NP: He might, he might have been shuddering to it but he didnít actually reach it actually. So really he has another point and 20 seconds on pixie boots starting now.

TH: I did actually wear some pixie boots on a plane...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: Was that repetition of wear?

NP: Yes, he was wearing them before.

RN: You were wearing them again, yeah.

NP: So Ross, correct challenge, 16 seconds, pixie boots starting now.

RN: Pixie boots took off, oh, ah, bla!

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged first.

SP: Hesitation and the use of a strange dialect!

RN: Pixie dialect! I was talking in pixie!

NP: Right so 14 seconds are available Sue, another point to you, pixie boots starting now.

SP: I went searching for the pixie and trapped some little thing...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: You were searching before.

SP: Yes but Iím still searching!

RN: Okay fine!

SP: And if you keep buzzing me, Iíll be searching until the end of time.

NP: I know but within the rules of Just A Minute you canít repeat the words.

SP: I think if Bonnie Langford is at this theatre, sheíll be...

NP: Eleven seconds for you Ross...

SP: I take it very badly.

NP: ... starting now.

RN: I very much like the pixie platforms. Theyíre my favourite type pixie boots. They were popular in the 60s with all those hip disco pixies that used to hang out at the magical discotheque...

BUZZ

NP: Wendyís challenged.

WR: Heís starting to hesitate. Just after magical. Iím sorry, Iím sorry...

NP: He was starting to hesitate but he didnít hesitate.

WR: There was a definite, there was a definite hesitation, I could see.

NP: He might have been starting it, he didnít achieve it. So er...

WR: He did! It was just after magical!

NP: Oh I love your keenness Wendy...

RN: I was shuddering!

NP: I will not dissuade you from being keen like this but Iím afraid Iíve got to be fair within the rules of Just A Minute. You have half a second left Ross on pixie boots starting now.

RN: Many professional...

WHISTLE

NP: So Ross Noble again speaking as the whistle went gained an extra point, has increased his lead. Heís ahead of Sue Perkins and Tony Hawks and Wendy Richard in that order. And Wendy itís your turn to begin, weíre going to hear from you now, my love. And the subject, so apt for Portsmouth and Southsea, victory. Tell us something about victory in this game starting now.

WR: HMS Victory is a magnificent vessel. I remember being taken there as a child, by my father, to walk over this great sailing ship. On one of the decks there is a brass plaque which says... ďon this site...Ē

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: I think she was shuddering towards a hesitation!

WR: No! I was taking in breath!

NP: So Sue a correct challenge, 45 seconds, victory starting now.

SP: I never visited HMS Victory because I came from Croydon. So all I have to say about it is itís a ship, and it must therefore sail on the ocean. Perhaps many famous things took place within it. Iím sure the good people of Portsmouth are proud, nay delighted, that this particular vessel is located within their own county. I however have no idea what Iím talking about...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: Sheís got no idea what sheís talking about!

NP: So what is your, within the rules of Just A Minute, what is your challenge?

TH: I think deviation.

NP: No, she wasnít actually deviating. Because she could say I donít know what Iím talking about...

TH: Yes...

NP: ... but as she keeps going and doesnít hesitate or repeat anything or deviate, um, she was still on the Victory even though she said I donít know what Iím talking about. Because she was still on Victory but not clear what she was talking about. As long as you still have the subject and donít know what youíre talking about, sheís keeping going, isnít she.

TH: As youíre ably demonstrating now!

LAUGHTER FROM SP AND THE AUDIENCE

NP: No, I, itís a difficult game on which to judge. I try to be fair and Sue, I give you the benefit of the doubt on this occasion. Twenty-six seconds, victory still with you starting now.

SP: There is a clue in the name however. In that I imagine HMS Victory was at some point victorious in a battle, though what that particular contest might have been...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy you challenged.

WR: Well she done something!

NP: She repeated HMS.

SP: Youíve got to guess Wendy...

WR: Yes.

NP: The subject is victory and she said HMS Victory and she used HMS Victory before.

TH: Surely a repetition...

SP: You canít help her out!

WR: But I...

SP: Youíre supposed to be impartial!

WR: Yes but I cannot understand. This is one of the most famous ships next to the Cutty Sark weíve got here, and you donít know what happened with it!

SP: Wendy...

CHEERS FROM THE AUDIENCE

SP: Iím just being honest! I could have just pandered to the crowd and lied and said I love HMS Victory. Nothing better I like doing every weekend than going there and scrubbing down the decks and pretending that Iím in the Admiralty!

NP: So what we do here is we give Wendy a bonus point because what she said, the audience responded with magnificence. Sue there are 17 seconds starting now.

SP: I am obsessed with Portsmouth! Iíve only been here for 24 hours, but my goodness, I love it...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: Repetition of Portsmouth.

NP: Yes you mentioned Portsmouth before. Tony youíve got in with 14 seconds on victory starting now.

TH: I saw a magnificent victory when Portsmouth FC beat...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: Isnít that a repetition of magnificent?

NP: Yes.

RN: When he talked about the ship...

TH: I havenít spoken in this round yet!

NP: It was, it was repetition of magnificent...

RN: Yes.

NP: ... but it was Wendy who said magnificent.

RN: No, he said it to me in the green room backstage. And it was magnificent, I can assure you of that!

NP: Tony, an incorrect challenge, 10 seconds for you on victory starting now.

TH: HMS Victory is a magnificent...

BUZZ

LOUD LAUGHTER FROM SP AND THE AUDIENCE

NP: Ross your light came on first.

RN: Was that a repetition of er magnificent?

NP: It was Ross, eight seconds, come on, tell us something about victory starting now.

RN: HMS Victory is a magnificent vessel. Itís er moored here...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy challenged.

WR: He hesitated.

NP: He did hesitate Wendy, you have a correct challenge, and you got in with only three seconds to go on victory starting now.

WR: Victory was the most important ship in our...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: Repetition of ship.

NP: You mentioned the ship before, when you started earlier on, Wendy, Iím afraid. So Tonyís got in with...

SHOUTS OF ďAWWWĒ FROM THE AUDIENCE

NP: Youíve got the audience on your side anyway, thatís the important thing. So Tonyís got in cruelly with only half a second to go on victory starting now.

TH: Manchester United...

WHISTLE

BUZZ

NP: Wait a minute! Wendy challenged. So Tony Hawks speaking as the whistle went gained an extra point. Heís now equal with Ross Noble in the lead, followed by Sue Perkins, and only two points behind is Wendy Richard. And Tony Hawks your turn to begin, the subject is roots. Tell us something about roots in this game starting now.

TH: To root in Australian vernacular means to have sexual intercourse. So imagine the consternation when I was watching a test match over there and I said ďIím rooting for England!Ē

LOUD LAUGHTER FROM THE AUDIENCE

TH: (in Australian accent) ďGeez! You got a national team?Ē

BUZZ

NP: Ross, Ross challenged.

RN: Well he sort of waited for the laugh, but he did pause. There was a hesitation.

NP: No, no, no, he did give, take a breath. He sort of rode the laugh but he did go through it.

RN: Thatís what I said.

NP: Benefit of the doubt to Tony on this one and, because it was a big laugh. Forty-five seconds, roots starting now.

TH: Some of you may remember that marvellous hit by Odyssey called Zipping Up My Boots, Going Back To My Roots. I used to dance around in the discotheques of Southsea to this particular...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Hesitation, as he remembered the halcyon days dancing around the discotheque. Iím sure... is there one or is there more than one in Southsea?

GROANS FROM THE AUDIENCE

SP: Oh I donít know anything about Southsea! Must I be continually booed for it!

NP: Well if you will engage the audience in conversation about it, youíre going to get some reaction! Sue, no, it wasnít a hesitation. Tony you still have the subject, another point of course, roots starting now.

TH: I remember watching a series, Roots. I believe...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: Repetition of watching. Watching the band?

NP: Watching the cricket.

RN: Iím sorry, it doesnít matter. Forget it!

WR: No, he was watching cricket, now heís watching...

RN: Yeah I knew heíd said watching!

NP: Yes!

RN: He did.

NP: Heís right and Ross you have 31 seconds on roots starting now.

RN: Right, roots, thatís what Iím going to talk about now. And Iím not going to pause before I say that my friend is always talking about putting down roots. And thatís because heís a tree that can speak! I know that seems ridiculous but all the time heís on and on...

BUZZ

RN: Ahhhhh!

NP: Itís a tough game! Tony you challenged first.

TH: Ah repetition of on.

NP: On yes, 17 seconds, roots starting now.

TH: Kunta Kinte was in this television programme and he was part of the roots of Arthur Haley whoíd written a very successful book called Roots. Interestingly enough, which makes it particularly pertinent to this subject which is why Iíve chosen to speak about him...

WHISTLE

NP: Tony Hawks was then speaking as the whistle went, gained that extra point, and he has increased his lead at the end of the round ahead of Ross Noble, Sue Perkins and Wendy Richard in that order. And Ross your turn to begin, the subject is a snake in the grass. Tell us something about that subject in this game starting now.

RN: A snake in the grass is something that you have to be very careful about whilst dancing in the Hawaiian national dress. If youíre not careful, one of those particular...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

RN: Careful, yeah.

TH: Yes re, repetition of careful, Iím afraid.

NP: Yes right.

RN: True yeah.

NP: And 50 seconds for you Tony on a snake in the grass starting now.

TH: I once had a pet snake called Chris who I used to take out to the grass of our back garden and out him in there. And he would wriggle around in that particular place as snakes are wont to do. And spectators started to come because it was such a spectacular site. But nobody could really believe that Christopher, as I had called him before... I abbreviated...

BUZZ

NP: Ross you challenged first.

RN: Repetition of called.

NP: Yes thatís right. Um thereís 26 seconds on a snake in the grass Ross starting now.

RN: A snake in the grass is what makes the national lawn mowing championships so exciting.

LAUGHTER FROM THE AUDIENCE

RN: Occasionally people will grab a large adder...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: I withdraw that. I thought heíd hesitated but he didnít.

NP: No he didnít, he went right the way through the laugh, unlike you on the other one when he challenged you. So Ross, an incorrect challenge, another point to you, 18 seconds available, a snake in the grass starting now.

RN: A snake in the grass is a cocktail which I enjoy in many discotheques here in Southsea. It consists of a snake bite placed...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Hesitation? Slightly?

NP: A slight one yes Sue, yes. Benefit of the doubt to you on this occasion and nine seconds, tell us something about a snake in the grass starting now.

SP: A snake in the grass is worth two in the hand. And who on earth would want a reptile swimming around your palm. It can be extremely venomous of course, and one swift prong to your face could be a bit...

WHISTLE

NP: So Sue Perkins was then speaking when the whistle went, gained that extra point. Sheís one behind Ross Noble, and sheís three behind Tony Hawks, and sheís just ahead of Wendy Richard. And Wendy Richard, itís your turn to begin, the subject is department stores. Tell us something about department stores in Just A Minute starting now.

WR: I have worked in several department stores, in between professional engagements. One department store I was at, I was sacked after the first day, because I did not sell one item of clothing. I thought this was most unfair, because if some woman put a coat on, and I thought it didnít look right, I told her! So it would be removed and put back on the hanger. I mean, fair does, you know, you want to help in these sort of things. Other times in department stores I was at, I was in the makeup department. I quite enjoyed that and spent all...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Hesitation.

NP: Yes there was a hesitation there Sue. So youíve got 25 seconds to tell us something about department stores starting now.

SP: I once worked in the basement selling toilets in a department store. And my job was to convince people they didnít want a normal cover for their toilet seat but rather a fancy one, perhaps with barbed wire...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: No, I think I made a mistake, because she said toilets and toilet.

NP: Thatís right, she did indeed. So incorrect challenge and er so youíve still got the subject Sue, 16 seconds starting now.

SP: In the midst of the depression which often hits those in the retail industry, I would put a toilet seat around my head and...

BUZZ

SP: Yes I did! Yes I did! Hello!

TH: Sheís definitely repeated one of them now!

SP: Yes!

NP: Toilet yes. Right, 11 seconds, department stores with you Tony starting now.

TH: One of the most famous department stores in the world has to be Harrodís in Knightsbridge. And many American tourists will...

BUZZ

NP: And Tony, Wendy challenged.

WR: Hesitation there. He was stumbling over American.

NP: So Wendy there are four seconds on department stores starting now.

WR: My favourite department store is Selfridgeís...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: No, sorry, Iíve got it wrong.

NP: You get more laughs from your false challenges than you do...

RN: Iíll just keep ringing! Just donít mind me!

NP: Incorrect challenge Wendy, another point to you, two seconds, department stores starting now.

WR: Which I refer to as my corner shop...

WHISTLE

NP: So Wendy Richard was speaking as the whistle went, gained that extra point, and with others in the round she has leapt forward! And sheís still er roughly where she was before...

WR: Fourth!

NP: Ah but youíre only just trailing Ross Noble, whoís just behind Sue Perkins. And just ahead of her is Tony Hawks. And Tony your turn to begin, the subject, u-turns. Can you tell us something about u-turns in this game starting now.

TH: It was Margaret Thatcher who famously said ďthe ladyís not for turningĒ. Who made her a very easy person to follow undetected! Because she was never...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: I thought he hesitated, but actually, maybe I misheard because the audience were laughing.

NP: An incorrect challenge, you were speaking Tony. And there are 45 seconds on u-turns starting now.

TH: (in old pirate voice) ďYou turns the wheel, Hawks,Ē said the captain to me as he sailed along on the HMS Victory...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Sorry, itís not... heís done nothing wrong. I just want to know where that accent comes from!

NP: It came out of Tonyís mouth!

TH: Thatís right!

NP: So Tony you have another incorrect challenge and you have another point and you have 39 seconds starting now.

TH: If you were driving along the motorway and you see a superstore youíd rather like to go to, the trouble is you canít just do a u-turn and pop off on the exit you need to get there. They make you drive 17 and a half miles in the wrong direction, come off and then go into the countryside somewhere, where the signs are wrong, you get completely lost, itís embarrassing. U-turns ought to be allowed in that situation. However theyíre not, and Iím not going to go on about it any longer!

BUZZ

NP: And Ross challenged first.

RN: If heís not going to go on about it, heís going to hesitate!

NP: He has hesitated.

RN: Yeah.

NP: It wasnít that he was going to, he did! So Ross a correct challenge and 11 seconds starting now.

RN: ďYou ternsĒ is often something that comes out of Bill Oddieís mouth as he affectionately refers to the seabirds that he surrounds himself with. ďYou terns are lovely,Ē heíll say as he...

WHISTLE

NP: So Ross Noble speaking as the whistle went gained an extra point. And heís now equal with Sue Perkins in second place behind Tony Hawks. And heís followed just a little way behind by Wendy Richard. So we go into the last round which weíre going to begin by Wendy Richard. And the subject Wendy is a second bite of the cherry. What a lovely subject! Tell us something about that in this game starting now.

WR: Iím not over fond of cherries. And have you seen the price of them in the shops at the moment? Goodness knows what country they bring them in from! But these cherries cost a fortune! Over eight pounds for one of those KG things, whatever that means. Seeing as Iíve not yet joined the Common Market, having no interest in it whatsoever! So itís not often one does get the chance for a second bite at the cherry...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: What does she mean she hasnít joined the Common Market?

NP: No, no, no, she was establishing that she, it wasnít a case of a physical matter. It was emotionally she was not with the Common Market.

TH: Okay.

NP: So she keeps the subject, 33 seconds, a second bite of the cherry starting now.

WR: Some cherries require...

BUZZ

NP: Tony challenged.

TH: This is a bit finicky, but stylish! Um, repetition of cherries, because the title is a second bite of the cherry.

NP: Thatís right, it is. Iím torn because as itís the last round, and Iíd love Wendy to finish with it...

TH: Go on then! Iíll have the point and hand it back!

WR: No! No! Iíll have the point, you do it!

NP: All right...

TH: All right...

NP: Let her have the point because sheís demanded it!

TH: Yeah! (laughs)

NP: And er Tony Hawks, correct challenge Tony, so you take over a second bite of the cherry and there are 31 seconds starting now.

TH: The beauty of the game Just A Minute is that you very often get a second bite of the cherry. If you make a mistake and one of your fellow... panellists...

BUZZ

NP: Sue challenged.

SP: Slight hesitation on panellists.

NP: Slight hesitation yes. So Sue you tell us something about a second bite of the cherry with 22 seconds available starting now.

SP: Usually a cherry is finished in one single bite, bearing in mind of course the average cherry is only so big. So it would take a tiny mouth...

BUZZ

NP: Wendy challenged.

WR: We had cherry twice.

NP: Cherry is on the card, my love. Itís cherries that are not on the card.

WR: Beg your pardon Sue.

SP: Thatís okay. Thanks for the point Wendy!

NP: Right...

SP: Always grateful!

NP: Right! Fifteen seconds on a second bite of the cherry Sue starting now.

SP: Unless of course itís a genetically modified cherry which could be up to a football in size...

BUZZ

NP: Ross challenged.

RN: Oh no, Iíve done it again, havenít I!

NP: Have you? Twelve seconds, a second bite of the cherry Sue starting now.

SP: If there were a small faced man with tiny incisors, might well need to peck away for an hour or two...

BUZZ

NP: Ross you challenged.

RN: Um repetition of tiny, tiny mouth, tiny man.

NP: A small faced man she said.

RN: No, she said with a tiny mouth before.

NP: No she didnít. Um eight seconds, a second bite of the cherry with you Sue starting now.

SP: So once youíve had a second bite of the cherry, where is there to go. Of course, the third or the fourth, well then it just gets the same taste and I donít like cherries anyway. I prefer a banana...

WHISTLE

NP: So Sue Perkins was speaking then as the whistle went, gained an extra point, and a lot of other points in that round. And she made a magnificent surge forward. But let me just tell you the final situation. Wendy Richard only just finished in fourth place. And she was a little way behind Ross Noble. And Sue with that magnificent surge did extraordinarily well, but she still finished up three points behind Tony Hawks , so we say Tony, this week you are our winner! So it only remains for me to say thank you to these four fine, exciting and highly committed players of the game, and in no order of beauty, or or talent or age I will say, who shall I put first? Well, Wendyís top of our list because sheís such a lovely lady. And then comes Sue Perkins who is such a lovely charming girl. And then Tony Hawks, who is a real charmer. And then the other right charmer over there, Ross Noble. Theyíre so sensitive! But all four of them, I thank them all for their contribution and their keenness! And also I thank Janet Staplehurst for her keenness as well, and blowing her whistle so well when the 60 seconds were up. We thank our producer Claire Jones for keeping us in order as best she can. And we are indebted to Ian Messiter who thought of and created this game. And we are deeply indebted to this lovely audience here in the Kingís Theatre in Southsea who have cheered us on our way! From our audience, from our panel, and from me Nicholas Parsons, good-bye, until the next time we play Just A Minute!

THEME MUSIC